Lost in Your Direction

Chapter 19

Every single person around us plays something for the world to run its purpose. You can be an instrument, a lesson, a blessing or simply a memory. And all of them are needed to carved a person's purpose- to be a human.

"Come on! You've got to see this thing." He rose and grabbed my hands. We get in the car and drove.

"Where are we going? You've got a lot of things to show me, huh?" He showed me his charming smile.

I don't know how he could hide all those things troubling him. I don't think he's just carrying it all alone in his shoulders.

"Rides! That's my favorite." "I haven't been to any rides all my life. I'm scared." I protested. "You're afraid of heights?" "Uh I guess so." I frowned and began shaking. "It'll be alright. Trust me."

He held my hand and for the very first time. I can feel my veins, muscles and joints contracted. My heart gone wild and its superior vena cava exploded a large amount of blood rushing to every single part of my body. My shaking stopped in the calmness of Chandler's touch.

His touch. It was surreal. I only read those from some of Nicholas Sparks' novels and I don't even know how it feels to be touched- to be held in one's hands. The revolting emotions, indescribable sensation, electrifying stimulus- all travelled my veins like a cannonball. But that touch tamed my soul, my heart and my body. All the trembling and shaking of my nerves got captured in his fondling touch. It's like a lingering sensation engraving permanent rhythm that my heart wants as much as my body does. All those feeling I thought of only as a writer's spices, all came to me, provoking my soul to want his.

As I roamed my eyes in the high-rising sceneries, I saw the large Ferris wheel decorated with neon lights out towered the surrounding buildings.

'ENCHANTED RIDES' I read. My nerves trembled as I stepped in the entrance.

"Come on. I'll stay beside you." I don't know if that was a song lyric from 5SOS but I held his arms and walked with him.

"Tickets for two, Ma'am." He talked to the rides' cashier and she gave him two tickets. We walked towards the ride and I can feel my heart thumping at the fastest rate.

"You'll gonna be okay. Just hold my hand." He assures. He let me step in the ride first and then he followed. He sat in front of me and took his phone. "Hey, smile!"
"Wait! How can I smile in this scariest stage of my life?" I frowned. "You'll be okay. Do you trust me?" "Yes."

He raised his phone and I smiled as he clicked it. Then he sat next to me and took our photo together. The Ferris wheel began rising. I can feel my feet shaking. He held my hand so tight and I felt I am safe in his arms.

The ride goes higher and higher. I can see the breath-taking view of the city kindled by the city lights and the majestic moon. I started to smile.

"Beautiful." Chandler whispered. I could not tell whether he's pertaining to me or the view. (Please don't call me assuming.)

"Yes. Yes! Yes!" I shouted and laughed. Chandler laughed and clapped for me like I won the Best Actress of the Year Award. "Now stay there and smile. The view's fantastic." He calmed me and took his shot. He's a very good photographer. He showed me the shot and I look like the happiest kid in the world.

"Now let me take a photo of you." I took my phone and captured the best ride buddy I had in my life. "Smile! Now another one." I clicked and clicked.

"He's so handsome." Those were the words my brain keeps on enchanting me.

He smiled and said, "So how do you feel now?" I giggled and answered, "Better. Thank you scrub face" and I hugged him and he hugged me back.

I don't know who commanded me to do it but I love that moment in my life. I just wish I could freeze the time and be on that scene for a lifetime. I found home in Chandler's arms. I don't know if he does found one at mine. Or maybe he just sees me as a resting place, not staying place. But I don't mind all of it. I erased all those 'what ifs' emerging in my mind. As the ride goes down, we started laughing and punching each other's arm.

Sometimes, I could imagine life being that ride Chandler and I has been to. At first, you're scared of what will happen during the process. But when you take your step and let yourself carried by the ride, you'll find out it introduces you to new heights, new chances, new opportunities. As you reach the top, you'll see how beautiful life offers; that it just prepares you to be strong, to face your fears so you can see the goodness of things beyond what you just see below. And when the ride goes down, you'll appreciate that the best view comes from the hardest climb; that every beautiful thing needs to take up time and the best you can do is to prepare yourself for it.