Along the way ( Province #1 )

Simula

"It's been a long time, since I've seen you here huh?"

I heard a manly voice beside me as I poured a drink on my glass, a long time huh? I think it is, thinking how I've went through after all this time, it's just another past tense to be said.

If I could just turned back the time, hindi ko sasayangin ang mga araw na ginugol ko sa lugar na iyon. My life almost perfect, it was straight. I could easily get what I wanted.

No hardship, no complications, just a pure single line, a perfect sculpture. Now it's ruined. I guess I wouldn't be able to find myself anymore. I was snapped out of my thoughts when I felt a strong arms on my waist. Oh! I almost forgot this man beside me.

I looked on the arms on my waist that feels suddenly irritating because of the warmth I felt. It's definitely not the same as was I've felt before. It's kinda irritating and awkward. I harshly grabbed the man arms then scoffed. I heard the man beside me whistle in amusement because of what I did.

"Easy, there. I won't do anything bad,"

My eyes finally landed on the man's face. His orbs was dark as eve, though it's now been equipped with a tiny stars because of the amusement written all over his face. His lips was a bit parted and wet because of the alcohol he drank earlier, probably? Thick eyebrows and a fair white complexion.

Not so bad, I chuckled when I remember how my preferences changed a lot just by meeting and knowing someone. It drives me nuts, big time.

"Done checking me out?"

He gave me a teasing looked, as he drank his glass that filled of Vodka. Checking me out your ass! hindi ko alam kung anong dapat kong i react sa sinabi ng lalaking nasa harapan ko ngayon. All I know is, I am looking for more, craving for more, and I know this man beside me will never give me that kind of satisfaction.

I drink the last vodka on my glasses, before standing up. Never minding the presence of the man was talking to me as if we've been close on our whole life. I'm done, I should go home and get a good night sleep instead. It's been a tiring day, no, it isn't just a day. It's been a tiring life.

"Hey wait..."

I heard the man's calling me, but I walked more faster. I've done enough. No more entertainment, no more foolishness...

I rode a taxi and told my place to go, I sighed and closed my eyes tightly. I'm not gonna cry, but sucks! naramdaman ko na lang na may tumutulong luha sa pisngi ko.

A single tear turns into a million tears, it landed on my lips.

I took out my tounge to have a taste, Bitter.

I thought alcohol was the most bitter taste that human could ever taste. But it isn't. It's the tears, a tears of pain that've been ingredient with foolishness and struggles.

"Where fucking have you been!?"

I heard a thunder roar when I finally set my foot in on our big mansion. It was my father, Alfredo Erejer. Naiintindihan ko ang ang galit nito. I was their only child. He's just being protective that's why he's being like that, I'm used to it.

I looked into his eyes, I couldn't even utter a single word. Where I have been? far away from pain. But it keeps hunting me. The more I escaped it, the more it chase me...

Feels like, I have my way back home. A shelter where I could meet more than my needs. But, why do I feel like, It's not the same as it is.

I saw my mom besides dad, gently caressing his shoulder to calm him. I lowered my gaze because of the intensity that my father's giving me.

"Sorry, dad. I-i just hang around to have some air,"

Air? really Gracia? you're not good at lying! and I badly hate myself because of that. I'm actually a bad liar, because even I myself can't accepted the fact that.

Damn! I shouldn't think about it. I shooked my head then walk to kiss my mother and father a goodnight.

"Okay, dear. next time tell us so we could know where we'll find you" she sighed "you know that we don't want to los-"

I cut her off. "Mom! I said sorry okay," I looked at her directly at her eyes "It won't happen again, Mom, don't worry... Good night."

Yes! It won't happen again. I won't let that happen again. I was once been a foolish, but once was enough to be back on sane.

Marahas kong sinara ang pintuan, at walang pasubaling binagsak ang katawan ko sa kama.

I found myself sobbing because of remembering him. The night seems bright for someone to have a party everywhere. But for someone like me.

The night seems gloomy that I couldn't even took a single glance on its darkness, because darkness consumed my life already. It's within me.

I closed my eyes once again tightly. Remembering the man I used to love. But now used to hate, along the way of loving someone like him.

I realized that...

A puzzle, it took people to solve it on a seconds, a minute or for an hours...

But, it feels like it took me forever to complete the every piece of the puzzle. And I know why. It's almost done, it's almost finished. But there's still a missing piece...

A piece that can never be found, a piece that's inevitable to be hidden. Finding that missing piece, brought me to confusion, pain and struggles. Because in the first place, that missing piece was not compatible on the blank space in the puzzle..

Along the way, of finding that missing pieces, bringing back the pieces somehow, made me lost myself. It will never be compatible, we will never be compatible...

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