Someone Out There Loves You (Adopted by Frank Iero)

PROLOGUE

*trigger warning: suicide attempt*

This is it.

I sat with my back against the tallest tree in the park near my house. The view from the hill was breathtaking. The sun was setting, bathing the world around me in an orange glow. The city skyline on the horizon. It was a strangely warm afternoon for January in Baltimore. Early Sunsets Over Monroeville was playing on repeat through my headphones.

I had many memories attached to this park, from carefree moments of my childhood to the times I would come here when I needed to get away from everything. It seemed fitting for it to be here.

I looked around, taking in my last few moments on this Earth.

I was ready to die.

I had nearly made it to 15. I had made a promise to myself that I would make it that far, but the person who made that promise hadn't lived through the events of today. If they had, they would understand why I could no longer keep that promise. I'm sure she would forgive me.

I glanced around the park, confirming that I was the only one here.

Good, I thought. The last thing I needed was an interruption.

It was getting hard to see from the fading light but once I was satisfied I was alone I unzipped my bag, pulling out the things I would need.

A bottle of pills.

Check.

A bottle of alcohol to wash them down.

Check.

The sharpest blade I had.

Check.

I took a deep breath. My heart was racing. I was on the brink of death and yet I had never felt more alive. I had downed most of the pills and the alcohol was burning my throat. My head was spinning. I began laughing uncontrollably.

Gerard's voice floated through my headphones.

But would anything matter
If you're already dead?

Suddenly, the troubles of the day no longer hurt.

For the first time in my life I was being selfish, and it felt really good. To do something I had wanted to do for so long. To take control of my life instead of others doing it for me. To leave this shitty world. To shut up the voices in my head. To not have to deal with consequences of my actions. To finally find peace.

But does anyone notice?
But does anyone care?

This was for me and me alone.

I picked up the blade, my hand shaking with adrenaline. I had thought about this moment for years, and now that it was here, I had never felt more ready in my entire life.

I looked at myself in the reflection of the steel and smiled. My first real smile in years. Too bad no one was here to see it.

Bringing the blade to my wrist, I took a deep breath.

"But does anyone notice there's a corpse in this bed?" I sang the final line, my voice shaking.

This was the end.