Disordered

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Mount Justice; October 23rd, 17:21 EDT

M'gann stirred her bowl of mix silently, while Kaldur leaned against the counter behind her, Wally slumped at one of the chairs, Artemis leaned against the back of one of the chairs, and Robin sat on the couch. All of them silent and stuck inside their own heads. In the Training Room, Red Tornado, Martian Manhunter, and Captain Marvel watched over the teens worriedly on the screens. They all turn an ear as they heard the Zeta Tube activate.

Recognize: Batman; 0-2

"How are they?" The Dark Knight asked immediately.

"I am still shaken by what you and I have wrought. One can only imagine what these youths fair," Manhunter said gesturing to the holo screens which they were watching the Team on. "Wanda has yet to leave her room, i believe trying to let her mind rest."

"I know our virtual reality training simulation went badly," he at least had the decency to look down as he thoroughly understated it. "but I'd hoped the team would've rallied by now."

Manhunter looked surprised, while Captain Marvel looked annoyed with Batman. "Trauma tends to linger, as I know you know, my friend."

The Dark Knight shrunk under his friend's words before looking up with a curious rise in his cowl. "Black Canary?"

"She has her work cut out for her." Manhunter said lowly.

Wanda walked back from the bathroom, throwing the blood stained tissue in her trash before laying back down on her bed trying to get some rest. Her head was still pounding from when she went into Megan's mind. Last night, the dream she had been having for the past few days, lingered in her mind, making her scared to even close her eyes just to be met by the same darkness.

"Hurting? Try traumatized." Robin managed. "I finally become leader and wind up sending all of my friends to their deaths. I-I-I know I did what I had to, but I hated it. When we started this team, I was desperate to be in charge. Not anymore. And-and that's not even the worst of it. Y-you can't tell Batman."

"Nothing leaves this room." Canary promises.

"I always wanted, expected, t-to grow up and-and become him. An-and the hero bit? I'm still all-in. But that thing inside of him?" Canary's façade broke a little as she watched him look ashamed and sound so nervous. "The thing that-that- that drives him to sacrifice everything for the sake of his mission? That's not me. I-I don't wanna be the Batman anymore." Robin couldn't look up from his hands. After his session with Canary, he decided to check on Wanda. He leaned on her doorframe watching her stare down at her lap. "Penny for your thoughts?"

She felt a small grin spread on her face. "How about a dollar?" The boy wonder came and sat next to her.

"How're you feeling?"

"Shouldn't i be the one asking you that question?" She finally lifted her head to look at him. He looked down at his hands once she did. "I don't want you to feel like you have to pretend with me, Dick. I want to listen to whatever is on your mind." Wanda placed her hand on top of his, letting him know that she was there.

It was a moment before he finally decided to let his facade drop. She watched as he became nervous, looking away from her feeling ashamed for even doing this. "I-I-I don't think i want to become Batman anymore." Robin paused but she squeezed his hand, encouraging him to continue. "I-I mean he has this-this-this thing-this drive in him to-to sacrifice everything for the sake of the mission. At first i thought i could do that since i had nothing to loose at the time, but now that i have you and the team," He finally looked at her letting a tear slip. "I can't do it. I just don't have it in me. I don't wanna let go of what i've worked so hard to get."

She used her other hand to wipe his tear away. "You don't have to be him, Dick. You can be better. Find a different solution. One where you'll be able to sleep at night knowing that you did what you could." The boy wonder offered her a great full grin. In response she kissed him, while he held her wrist. This was the first time that he had been vulnerable with someone and since he was being honest, it felt good.

When he pulled away he remembered why he had come to her in the first place. "Wanda, how are you feeling?"

He looked at her worriedly, letting her know that he was serious. Wanda let out a shaky breath before speaking. "I didn't wake up right away when i-" She paused, choosing her words carefully. "When it happened." Her eyes drifted away from his. "I was-i felt stuck. Everything was dark but i could still hear-hear people talking, people i didn't know or-or even recognize. I could feel the ground, i could smell the air, but i couldn't see. I couldn't move."

That's when her hands gripped the sheets. "Was it a memory?"

"I-I don't know. It-It could've been but that's the scary part. It's wondering if i should be happy that i finally have a part of my past life back or angry that i got something i never wanted in the first place. It's-It's scary not knowing what to do with it. I know people like this would give anything to have a piece of them back but i just can't stop thinking of how to get rid of it, h-how to make the memories stop, h-how to make the dreams-everything stop. Every time i wake up i just feel even more scared than before. And i don't know where the fear is coming from but i want it to go away. I'm scared that when i went into M'gann's mind, she unlocked that part of me." He watched as tears fell from her eyes. "I don't want to remember."

Before he could say anything she quickly wiped them away, composing herself. It confused him but soon understood when M'gann lightly knocked on the doorway. "Wanda, Black Canary wants to talk with you."  The martian kept her head down as she walked past her, still ashamed of what she did.

Canary sat back in her seat, crossing one leg over the other. "How are you, Wanda?" Her head remained down as she asked the question. "Let me rephrase, how are you feeling?" Still she remained silent. The Leaguer leaned forward. "Wanda, i want to help you get through whatever it is that you're-"

"At Cadmus, when we-i was being experimented on, Pietro would constantly ask me how i thought our lives were before this." She brought her hand up, showing her the small hex. "I never knew how to answer so i'd tell him that we were happy. But the truth is, i don't think i was. I never wanted to know how my life was, i didn't care. I'm okay with not knowing because if i ever got them back i knew that i'd wish i never had them."

"And why is that?"

She finally looked at her, with tears streaming. "Because i would always wonder why i was happier then and not now. Or why i had to go through all of that just to end up like this. I wouldn't be able to live with that regret, with that feeling. But when i got stuck in a memory before i woke up from the simulator," Canary's eyes widened. "I was scared to even think of how i was then. Is it wrong, for me to wish that i could just erase them completely?" With that she broke into tears, gripping her thighs tightly. Black Canary simply watched, unsure of what to say or even do. This was the first time she was even seeing her like this; so vulnerable.

..........................................................................

Mount Justice; October 23rd 21:07 EDT

Wanda stood in the kitchen in front of the kettle, making herself a cup of tea. Her finger moved slowly as she used her hex to stir the spoon in her cup. She didn't know how long she was standing there but at some point Robin entered the kitchen with a worried expression on his face. He went to stand next to her, leaning his back on the counter as he stared down at the ground.

My family was killed in a trapeze accident right in front of me. I know it's nothing like your situation but i would give anything to forget that moment, to forget them. Just so the dreams would stop, so i wouldn't wake up scared.

He looked at her.

It's okay if you don't want to remember. It's okay to want them gone. It's okay to start over. Martian Manhunter can help stop the dreams-

The thing is Dick, i don't know if i want to. I feel split in two. One part of me wants them to stop but that other part is still holding onto the hope that one day, i will want to remember. I don't think i want to let that go just yet.

Why not?

She lifted her head to look at him with a sad smile. "'Cause i just got it."

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