Days have gone by and there's still no hope in escaping the dark place that's been dug for you. Every sound, every movement feels like a lullaby that is drawing you closer and closer to losing your life altogether.
Lily felt like she'd already lost her whole life, it had been torn away from her all at once. How are you supposed to feel when someone so close to you gets ripped away from life, and being torn away by the love of your life. There's so much heartbreak to deal with and sometimes it's not easy to deal with, in fact it's not easy at all.
Lily had been mopping around for days. Her heart never took a break. She couldn't stop herself from crying everyday. How could she possibly get out of this depressing place that's printed in her mind. She felt like she couldn't.
She sat on her bathroom floor, heating up a needle with a lighter and pressing it into her skin, distracting herself from the pain that she felt inside. She knew what she was doing was wrong, but she needed to feel it. The distraction was a demand in her mind.
She cried as the hot metal burnt her skin. She enjoyed the feeling of letting the pain out but causing more pain to come out of it.
Everything around her was raining. A dark cloud surrounded her and she hated it with a passion, but it probably hated her just as much seen as it hovered over her for days. It was like carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders and it's slowly breaking you each day, it's becomes to heavy to carry everyday so you just break, and that's exactly what is happening to Lily.
Lily was waiting for some sort of miracle to happen. She has waited for that miracle since all the guys dropped out of high school to go on tour, she thought that miracle happened when she was reunited with everyone. Once she got her family back, it was torn away from her not even a year later.
How would you feel if that happened to you? You wouldn't feel right. Afterwards, nothing feels right. Something in your life will always be missing because that specific person is no longer with you. You become emotionally damaged from the loss and the pain that takes over you, slowly kills you and somehow you can either battle it and overcome or you can let it win and you could also lose your life to the heartache and pain that came along with losing a loved one, and that pain moves into someone else.
It's like a never ending cycle. It never stops, it goes on and on and on. Why does this happen? That's part of life. Feelings. They're part of life and you feel them everyday. Sometimes it's not the feelings you want to feel, but it happens and there's ways that you can avoid it, but my necessarily all the time.
The thing with pain is that it demands to be felt, but so does love. Pain and love are together, you get love and it comes with pain. There's no way in life that you will experience love without the feeling of pain that comes too. If you don't experience pain with love or anything else, there's something wrong.
Things are being kept from you or your heart isn't in it. Your mind thinks so, but the heart isn't. Everything should come from the heart because the mind is just a reassurance and a guide, but the heart is the real deal. The heart knows what it wants, but the mind wants what it doesn't need, but the heart wants what it needs. They're like enemies.
The mind wants something that the heart doesn't want and if the mind gets what it wants, the heart gets hurt. Although, the heart gets what it wants the mind will eventually if not immediately be thankful for what the heart has received. Doubts won't cloud your head. There will be no questions, just peace.
"Lily, open the door" Matt knocked on the door.
He had been knocking for up to twenty minutes. He still hasn't realised that the door is in fact unlocked. Lily chose to ignore him completely. She wanted space, time and to be alone. But they weren't giving her that. They were constantly peering over her shoulder, checking up on her.
