Dealing With It (Todobaku)

Back to School

(Hello I know that I haven't posted in a while but I've been really unmotivated and anxious from school so I'm really sorry for not posting but I've prewritten a bunch of parts so I should be posting daily again. Also I wish you good luck to those in school)
(Warning cutting and suicidal thoughts)

Todoroki POV
When I wake up I'm already healed so I get up and see Aizawa sitting next to my bed. He's also fully healed. "Where's Katsuki?" He's in the room next to us along with Mic. We walk to their room and I see that Mic and Kat are still asleep. "How are they doing?" Aizawa looks down "Mic will be fully healed and better in a couple days but Bakugou." he pauses "he's in a coma and they don't know when he'll wake up."

I sit down in a chair close to me and close my eyes This is all my fault, I should have been stronger and protected him, or just stayed with my dad and then all of them would be safe. I feel Aizawa hug me and I'm brought back to reality. I start to cry and I feel like the tears will never stop. Honestly I just feel like curling up in a ball and disappearing so nobody else gets hurt.

We head back to Aizawa's house and I immediately sit on my bed. I remember Aizawa saying that while I was in the hospital the pros fixed the house but I hadn't even noticed. The tears have stopped but the pain continues. Actually at this point I wish I would just cry because the pain and guilt is so much worse.

I walk over to my desk and see my knife sitting there. I begin to slice my arm. I don't stop until I feel lightheaded and realize I can't pass out or they would find me so I clean up and lay back down. In total I made about 36 cuts on my arms.

I deserve more. I should just end it, it's not like anybody would miss me and nobody else would get hurt because of me. I try to think of happier thoughts but without Katsuki I just feel empty so there's nothing to stop me from feeling this. This wasn't the first time I had debated s**cide.

~time skip to the next day~

When I wake up in the morning I remember that today is the day that I head back to school. I get ready and head downstairs where I see Aizawa getting ready. "Mic is getting released later today so I will pick him up after school, would you like to come?" I nod and we head out to the car and head to the school. Since Aizawa had to get here early I just sit in the empty classroom and wait for everyone else to get here.

I daze off again and begin to overthink. Kat... I feel tears start to rise but I push them back down and see Deku, Uraraka and Iida come in. "Todoroki!" Deku comes over and gives me a hug. "We saw everything on the news." I turn to Iida. That's right they know everything now, my dad, me and Kat, oh no... Uraraka also gives me a hug. "We all feel bad about what happened with your dad, you should have told us." I pull away from her hug and they all go to sit down.

Slowly the class comes in until everyone's there, except Kat. People start to crowd around me and I feel claustrophobic. Seeing their stares of pity makes me feel weak. Aizawa comes in and makes everyone sit down. "I assume that all of you saw the news and know Bakugou will be out of school for a few days, are there any questions?"

Aizawa POV
(For this part it was hard to write all the dialogue so to make it easier the questions are in quotation marks and Aizawa answers are underlined)

Mina raises her hand "When will Bakugou be back." I don't know.

Next was Tsu "What will happen to Endeavor?" I see Shoto sink a little lower in his seat. He will have a trial and then the judge will decide what will happen to him.

I see Uraraka "Is it true that Todoroki and Bakugou are dating?" I see problem child's eyes widen. I know that he's had a crush on Shoto for a while, it's been obvious. This should be fun. I'll let Shoto answer that question. Shoto shoots me a look and then looks at the floor and mumbles. "Y-yeah" The class looks in shock. Most of them are happy and supportive but Mineta and problem child look angry. I should keep an eye on them.

I get everyone's attention back on me. "That's it for questions, let's begin class."

Todoroki POV

We finally begin class and the attention shifts off of me. I can't believe he did that to me! At least everyone was happy with it. Although I wonder why Midoriya looked angry, I thought he would be happy for me. Maybe it's just because he doesn't like Kat or he was surprised. Mineta looked angry too, but that's probably just Mineta being Mineta. I hope Kat will be okay.

Then Aizawa asks me a question and I realize I don't know the answer. He just looks at me but moves on and I try to pay attention to class but it's hard when all I can think about is Kat. Please wake up soon. I don't think I can live without you.

(887 words)