24. Ventiquattro

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I took a deep breath to calm my nerves but it wasn't helping really

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I took a deep breath to calm my nerves but it wasn't helping really. I was standing at the center stage under the roof where ballet recitals take place. One of the troops just left half an hour ago after their practice. I tipped my head back and drew another long breath. But now the ginormous ceiling above me was making me jittery. There were so many ropes and lights what if one of them gets loose and hurt my honey bees.

"Zara..." Startled, my head snapped toward Maximus' echoing voice. A bone inside my neck cracked, for moving it too quickly. Damn it.!

"Sorry." Maximus apologized, scrunching his nose sympathetically.

"It's okay." I waive it off slowly moving my neck, massaging the ache with my palm. 

 "What are you doing here. The kids have gone home already.?" he asked.

"I was just admiring the view." I say dreamily, looking at the rows of seats in front of me. I hope all the parents and their other family members come and fill the empty seats to encourage the kids to perform on the stage.

The Royal auditorium was inspired by the themes of Roman halls. Gian was so sweet to give a free hand to Maximus. So generous to allow us to book this auditorium for our annual celebration a day before Christmas break begins. 

"It is beautiful." Maximus said, following my line of sight.

"You are not nervous.? I was afraid of how the kids were going to react. But they were so excited. I don't think anything can scare them now." I say happily.

"In college, I had given plenty of presentations. But I was nervous during the first few times." he shrugged.

"Presentation." I mumble feeling my anxiety grow. I cold shiver ran down my spine, my stomach coiled. On wobbly legs, I walked away from the stage getting refuge into the darkness of backstage. The fear of standing in the middle of the stage still remained with me. 

My phone notified me of incoming messages, upon checking I found one SOS from Helen and another from Gian asking me if I am okay with eating something Italian other than pizza and pasta. We are going to spend the night together again. My habit of probing everything around me kept me occupied regarding the small details for the program. But everything is settled now and I can spend my time with Gian without overthinking.

In the dilemma, I chose Helen. I texted Gian an apology and walked out. What if she really needs me this time. Not like the first and last time when I visited her apartment. She only wanted to talk about her lack of their dating life as though I wasn't single and alone. 

*****

I pulled my winter jacket close as I stepped out of the auditorium. The wind picked making limbs rattle. I was hurrying my steps when Maximus called my name. 

"Is someone coming to pick you up?" he asked looking around frivolously.

"No, I will be taking a cab." I answer him, as I had canceled on Gian who was supposed to drop me home.

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