windfall

thirty-five: "you give love a bad name"

Normal: Kat Torres
Bold: Easton Adley

~

Today 7:15 am

hi kat

it's 7am on my side so you're probably not up yet

or you are, i don't really know what you do at 3 in the morning

i couldn't sleep so i thought i would call you again, but you didn't answer.

like yesterday.

i called you 28 times

idk if your phone broke or if you were just ignoring me but i figured i'd text you anyway just so you know

i figure i probably freaked you out with the whole i love you thing. i didn't mean to tell you like that but it just came out and even if it was true i shouldn't have said it like that. i know you have your doubts about us because of the distance and the fact that your parents didn't have good relationships but i think you should know that we're not like that. we're long-term, kat. even if it's as friends, i feel it in my bones that we're going to be together for a long time. god, it's only been half a year but it feels like i've known you forever. i guess that's what love does to you. don't tell corbin this, but it feels like you're my family and my best friend and the love of my life all at once.

i probably shouldn't tell you how in love with you i am since me telling you i love you is the whole reason you're not talking to me but i can't turn off the fact that i'm completely and utterly in love with everything you are, katia jessamine torres.

i could list all the things i love about you but i think a certain movie says it all.

i love the way you talk to me (especially when we're being idiots and you say my name in that little snort way)

i love the way you cut your hair (i can't stop thinking about how your ponytail swings back and forth and what it would feel like to touch your curls)

i love the way you *drive my car* (if i had a car i would love the way you drove it)

i love it when you stare (specifically when you think i'm not watching)

i love your big, dumb combat boots (this actually fits - remember when you send me a picture of those wicked shit-kicker boots? be still my beating heart)

i love the way you read my mind (you know what i'm about to say before i even say it and it honestly blows me away how well you know me)

i love the way you're always right (even when you're wrong, you're right because I'm not a big enough idiot to argue with you)

i love it when you lie (cause you're so bad at it and your nose scrunches up and you can't keep eye contact to save your life)

i love it when you make me laugh (you can do it even when all i want to do is die)

which brings me to my next point: i love it when you make me cry (mostly after you ignored me for eight days and my teary, puffy eyes reminded me that i love you enough to soak through two pillows)

kat. i hate it when you're not around and the fact that you didn't call (that you hung up on me even).

i love the way i could never hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

kat, i love you and i won't apologize for doing so. i won't apologize for not being able to live without you. i won't apologize for filling up your voicemail and sending you a hundred texts, just so you understand that i'm so completely in love with you.

even if you never reply to me or never call me back, i'm won't apologize for having someone to love.

(i will apologize for that queen reference, i know that was what got us into this whole thing in the first place)

you don't have to say it back or anything or even acknowledge me

but please, if you even read until the end of this, please don't be scared, kat. you don't have to be scared of a crazy, little thing called love.

i hope you especially won't be scared of my love.

Today 3:38 am

I've been shot through the heart

And you're to blame

Easton?

You give love a bad name

I love you