Soldier // j.j.k

5.

That morning, he wore his black suit for the funeral and also a suitcase, containing his uniform. He will have to report last night event to the post and received an order from the higher up regarding the shooting event. An innocent life was killed, so he might have to explain what actually happened as he was not the one who got shot.

He walked down the stair and saw Haewon feeding their daughter. He smiled at the sight and walked towards them. He was about to kiss her lips when she looked away, preventing him to take a step on her. Jungkook knew she was mad, but he couldn't do anything except going to work. The one week rest looks like it will end after one day.

"You will regret not kissing me, dear"

She stayed silent and ignored him. The incident last night somehow left a scar on her heart. The way she might lost him forever if Mister Jones didn't came to save him was enough to make her trembled. Jungkook had always choose the country than her, but this time she could not imagining losing the only man she love in her life. She slowly took Jaeun in her arms, patting her back after feeding the child and walked to the living room. Her husband eyes only look at her, sighing at the silent treatment he was receiving from the woman.

"You know I won't leave until you talk to me, dear"

Haewon again refuse to say anything about it and continue patting Jaeun back. When the girl let out a small burp, she smiled and slowly lay her down in the baby cot. Jaeun eyes slowly closed and within a minute she was back to dreamland. The mother smiled softly at her, looking at the features her daughter had. The eyes and lips were Jungkook, and she remember how Jungkook claimed that she will be the most pretty lady in London when she grow up, thanks to his genes.

"Haewon, I am sorry-"

"Are you going to stop saying sorry when you die?"

That did silenced him. It was harsh, and he knew his wife wasn't mad because he need to go to work, but the incident last night. She never argued about his time of work, but to see her worked up at the morning was enough the tell him that she was angry at what happened last night. He slowly walked up to her, but she was fast enough to slip away to the stairs. Her foot stomped at the staircase and Jungkook followed suit. The funeral starts in an hour, so he have time to spare.

The pair reached their bedroom and she was about to close the door when he stopped her. The man went in and before Haewon could get angry, his lips had captured her and he slowly lay her down to the bed, him hovering her. The woman repetitively punched his chest but there was no use.

"You-," she was cut by the man continues kissing on her lips and somehow she gave up on fighting. Once he felt her body wasn't tense anymore, he broke the kiss and stared into her dark black eyes, one that managed that grab his attention at the bar and the one that looked at him in fear and hesitant when they were about to make love for the first time.

"I don't know how many times I say this, but I am sorry"

"When you left me and Jaeun in the basement, did you feel sorry?," her voice broke, eyes started to be full with tears but she don't want to cry in front of him. She knew he was doing his duty as a soldier, but she was still in fear of losing him. Two years was supposed to be enough in learning his situation, but that wasn't for Haewon.

"You don't know the fear of losing you right in front of my eyes, Jungkook. If it wasn't you who opened the door, I don't even think I can run to my uncle house. It will be more preferable to be shot by the soldier, than living without you"

"Haewon-"

"You can call me selfish for only thinking about myself, but do you really think I could survive this war with her growing up without a father ? If Jaeun wasn't born, I might move on from you. But to see your face in hers was enough to make me become weak. I won't care if you died in an operation Jungkook, because I was prepared for that whenever you got a call from the military office, but for you to die right in front of my eyes was something I will never be prepared, and I don't want to prepare myself for that"

By the time she said that, tears rolled down her cheeks and she slowly pushed Jungkook away from her. He didn't resist her, and his expression was unreadable. She was right. Never once Haewon almost saw him die right in front of her eyes. It was understandable if her mind had imagined the worst for it. And Jungkook never want her to see him dying. He doesn't want to leave the world seeing the woman he loved will forever mourned for him.

She stood up and walked to the door, but she halted her step which caught his attention. She looked back and let out a subtle smile. It was sweet yet painful, and Jungkook never knew a smile so beautiful could broke his heart into piece.

"If one of us is going to die, at least not in front of each other. Or the pain will be there forever"