perhaps, you | woosan

Chapter Thirty One

POV: San

San felt strange.

Jeong Yunho had always been that person who spiked an emotion in him—pleasantly before, frustratingly in recent. But as he sat next to him around the rim that surrounded pretty flower beds, bathing in warm sunlight, he was nothing but calm.

"Sorry for stealing your lunch time," Yunho said.

"No, I also think we need to talk."

Yes, Choi Jongho was right, as much as San hated to admit.

He was running away from all the inconvenient realities, putting a lid on it as if hiding it away would make it disappear. But Yunho was very much planted in his memory until recently, and it was about time he sucked it up, faced it, and moved on.

"I wanted to apologise for what happened that night," Yunho paused, glancing up far ahead in the greenery of the air. "And for hurting you back then, San.

"I had every excuse in my mind back then, wanting to comfort myself for hurting you, but nothing can justify what I've done. I'm a dick for letting you go like that, and I truly am sorry."

A silence settled in between the two, and only the faint sound of people's laughter somewhere in the area, a chirp of birds saved it from being a heavy one.

"We were young, Yunho." San paused, inhaling the warm afternoon breeze, together with the sounds of the surrounding, cheerful and ordinary.

"We didn't know what we wanted. We were vulnerable and selfish. We thought that justified hurting and neglecting others. We make mistakes. And we learn."

Truth be told, it hadn't been long since they broke off. But back then, they were both immaturely immersed in love, so endeavoured that they lost the direction of each other. They were youngsters in terms of love, losing control of themselves, not being able to see the other.

"...Do you regret meeting me?"

San shook his head gently at the taller's worried question.

"I'm glad I met you, Yunho," he slowly turned to look at the other, hoping he could deliver his sincere feelings that he had always had, but tried so hard to ignore it because he was dazed by pain.

"I've come to accept myself, thanks to you. Thank you for pulling me out of the dark place."

If he didn't meet Yunho, if Yunho didn't love him, if he didn't love him back, he could still be in that dark cell, chewing himself, stabbing himself with an imprinted failure. And that was what scared San the most. It was a blessing he had met Yunho. Even though the paths diverged, that would never change.

Yunho's eyes glistened under the sunlight, a gentle breeze wafting his hazel hair.

"I'm glad I met you, San. Thank you for letting me hold your hand."

In that moment, San felt a heavy load leave his body.

Jeong Yunho wasn't his nightmare anymore. He was his memory; bitterness mixed with sweetness, but will soon lean on the latter as time goes by.

After a moment of comfortable silence, San prompted. "Have you settled things with Mingi?"

"For now, yes," he groaned. "He could act out again, but I've decided to not give up on us easily and face the problem until we really see the end...I'm not going to make the same mistake again."

San smiled softly at his old friend's resolution.

People make mistakes. People hurt someone, and are hurt by someone. People learn. People grow. It was only a matter of acceptance and a courage to step forward.

"So, are you dating Wooyoung?"

San felt his heart skip at the question. Oh, how he wished. "What? No, he's straight."

Yunho pulled himself back in a frown. "Really?"

"Yeah, he's been announcing that ever since he found me gay."

Yunho flipped his head up, his eyes catching a glimpse of a blonde-haired male leaning on the pole in a distance. Feeling playful, he leaned in closer to San, palming his cheek, resting an elbow on one of his everlasting legs. Then he asked dubiously. "Are you sure?"

"What makes you say that?"

"The death glare he gives me tells me otherwise," Yunho arched his eyebrows, and San could only shrug.

"You know, Sannie," started the taller man, a tone infused with more friendliness than what they had been sharing for the last few years. San turned to look at the man, patiently waiting for him to continue.

"You are quite sharp with the feelings of others who you don't really care about, but quite dense when it comes to someone you do care."

"Are you calling me stupid?"

"Maybe," Yunho admitted, which resulted in a playful slap by San. The two giggles floated in the air, and it was as if old times came back.

"No, but you should confirm. I believe you have a bright future."

"And if I don't?"

"Then...I'll leave my arms open for you?" He said, opening his arms wide open.

"No thank you," San rolled his eyes, and pushed the other's chest with not much force but Yunho staggered dramatically.

A/N:

Happy Wooyoung day ♥♥♥