Still In The Dark | BILLIE EILISH

part 51

(Trig's Pov)

I was brushing my teeth when I saw a familiar figure walk up behind me and wrap their arms around my waist

"morning baby" Billie whispered and started placing small soft kisses on my neck

I let myself sink into her touch and spat the rest of the toothpaste out of my mouth. I spun myself around to face her but she was gone

"bil?" I looked up to see her standing by the doorway

"t-trig?" she said scared

She stared at me blankly whilst clutching her stomach. Then her face turned into an evil smile before she screamed and started coughing up blood. I didn't know what to do. The blood was pooling out of her mouth and she was laughing.

"NO!" I yelled "BILLIE ISNT HERE" I screamed collapsing to the floor and shoving my face into my hands

I screamed again when I felt someone touch me

"shhh calm down it's okay it's me Kat" she said softly

"s-she was here" I cried looking up to see Billie's face again with even more blood. But now it was on her stomach, the baby isn't there.

"STOP" I yelled "JUST MAKE IT STOP PLEASE JUST MAKE IT STOP" i begged

Of course it wouldn't be Kat, they still have another week left on their Trip as it got extended. I haven't seen Billie for 2 weeks since she walked out on me. And now I'm really going insane.

Phantom and Ghost had both found me, I knew they were real because they were calming me down. It's like they knew what had happened and what I had saw.

It felt like a lifetime before I eventually had calmed down. Then I remembered, I had set up camera's everywhere to capture my episodes. I don't know why really. I wasn't going to show anyone anyway. But don't worry I have it angled so it doesn't show anywhere near the shower. I've thought this through.

I'm starting to realise that without Billie i'm unstable. I need Billie. But I don't want to have to need her, I don't want to live where I need to depend on someone to stay sane. I need to learn how to control myself, so in a way, i'm thankful for Billie leaving me.

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bro- not you lot saying how much you love the book😌🤚🏻

i'm actually so glad you enjoy it bc my heads a mess n sometimes i don't even wana make more i even get episodes where i literally wana delete the book

but i'm not bc i starting to realise when i'm in an episode now which is good

don't ask what i have bc idk haven't been diagnosed

but anyways that's not the point, the point is i love you all so fucking much and when yous say how much you love the book it motivates me sm i rlly can't thank yous enough 🤍