"What's up with jemily"

Willow Tree

JJ's pov:

It's been approximately 1 month since Elle died, no one has been the same. Especially not Emily.
She blames herself for it all, she's been very distant lately, she's even pushing me away.
I've asked her countless times to talk to me and open up and she just responds with 'I'm fine' or 'not right now I'm tired.'

I've been trying to give her space but I'm worried about her, I'm worried she's gonna start cutting again, or go back to letting alcohol solve her problems.
We haven't stayed at one another's house for at least a week. I know she's alive at least because she still comes into work.

I just miss my bright Emily, my Emily who used to smile all the time, my Emily who used to laugh at pointless things, my Emily that teased me and the rest of the team, my sarcastic Emily, my funny Emily, my bright Emily, my childish Emily, my handful Emily, my happy Emily, my Emily.

Now it feels like we are millions of miles apart even when we are in the same room together. I feel like I was more with her when she was in London rather than when she's standing right next to me.

Every since Elle died it seems like all the color and life had been sucked out of everyone, even Penelope.
When you walk into her office it isn't as happy and inviting, it's cold and sad.

Everyone changing. Reid doesn't state random facts anymore, Derek doesn't make inappropriate comments anymore, Hotch barely leaves his office, Rossi isn't his sarcastic self, Penelope doesn't wear colorful things anymore, Emily isn't smiley or happy, leaving me....alone. In a dark abyss with nothing and no one to turn to.

I can't even turn to my own child for comfort! Last week, my mother and Will filed for full custody on Henry, and the court allowed it because of my job.
I was losing everything
everyone
Myself.

There was still one person I could turn to. Roslyn.

Everyday since all the tragic events, I've talked to her. Obviously she doesn't talk back, but I can feel her listening to me, and being honest it feels good to have someone listening to me like a weight is being lifted off my shoulders.

It's up to me to pull this team back together! For Elle.

I had to take on the responsibilities of being the glue of this team to hold it where it is and then gradually move it so it fits together. Like putting together a puzzle. You have to find the pieces, before you can put it together.
I gathered everyone in the conference room for a well needed talking to.

"What's up JJ? Do we have a case?" Reid asked quietly.

"No we don't have a case but I need to talk to you guys about something." I said back.

"Oh my god JJ....you're pregnant?!" Morgan shouted.

Emily threw him a side was super confused look.

"No......we are in here for another more important thing." I said.

"What's more important than a mini Jennifer?" Garcia asked.

"Well I've noticed that since the events that have taken place lately everyone is well....losing themselves." I started to tear up. "And uhh I don't think this is the way Elle would've wanted her memories to be held, by constantly mourning and grieving and hurting. We should be talking about all the amazing things she did and what an amazing person she was....we need to come together, as a team, and as a family. Quite frankly because we are falling apart and I can't stand watching it happen." I breathed out.