[OLD] One Helluva Boss! (A Blitzø x reader fanfiction/Oneshots, Scenarios, etc)

Helluva Boss (Pilot)

In the city of Imps, placed a tall building next to a sign that said 'Welcome to Imp City'. In the building, there was a closed door with a poorly written sign that read saying "Meeting in progess", where 4 people sat in a long gray table, along with a slender tall imp next to a bulletin board.

"Alright, now I know business has been a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here. Moxxie." He states quietly to himself while looking at the imp, supposedly named Moxxie, who gave him an offended glare. "Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?" The tall imp told his employees. A female imp raised her hand excitedly. "What about a car wash?!" Y/n simply giggled at her energetic attitude. "This is hell Millie, no one cares about cars being cleaned here!" The tall imp tried to brainstorm more ideas. "Ooh, what about a billboard?" He said with sparkling eyes. "We can't afford a billboard, sir." Moxxie said crossing his arms. "Yeah, he's got a point, Blitzy." Y/n said to her lover. "Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now." Blitzø said to Moxxie, then looked at Y/n. "Thank you my little cupcake for telling me that!" Blitzø told Y/n as he gave her a kiss on the cheek. Moxxie was about to say something before he cut himself off. "Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?" Blitzø said as he turned on the T.V. Showing Blitzø hitting someone with a mallet with blood splattering everywhere, Moxxie holding a gun against someone, then shooting him with him flying off, Y/n slicing open someone with her claws from behind, Loona viciously biting someone while they scream in agony, and Millie cutting someone's head off with a spear as she giggled maliciously.

All the employees were watching while eating popcorn. Millie and Moxxie were siting next to each other, Loona was on the other side, and Blitzø and Y/n were handing out the popcorn Y/n made. "Ah, those were the good times..." Blitzø sat down with Y/n as he put his arm around her. "I don't need any reminding, sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel nobody watches..." Moxxie stated in frustration as Millie happily ate some popcorn. Blitzø got up. "Uh, hey, excuse me! What's 'obnoxious' about a super-fun jingle, all right? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!" All the employees had sat down on the table while he talked. "People love musicals, sir!" Millie told her boss. "Exactly, Millie! And we're basically doin' a musical! Are you gonna crush my musical theatre dreams like my dad did?" Blizø said as he raised his fist and looked down. "Sir-" "'Cause right now, all I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside." Y/n patted him on the back. Millie leaned in. "Are you trying to crush his dreams Moxxie?" "I‐- What?" "I thought I knew you..." Millie flirted towards her husband. "I can't believe you, Moxxie, after I made you 2nd employee of the month! Y/n will always be first." Blitzø said as he held up two pictures. One with Y/n, smiling beautifully, with heart stickers, little nice notes, and a badge that says, '#1 hottest demon!' With Moxxie's picture, it showed of him, clearly not ready for a photo with a silver sticker that said, 'Mediocre'. "Okay, sir! I'm sorry, a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre. Nobody actually likes the jingles." "We liked it!" Millie and Y/n say at the same time. Moxxie started to grow tense. "Do not-- Do not agree with him in front of me. Especially you, Madam Y/n. I won't and can't hurt the princess of hell."

"Hi there! I'm Blitzø (the o is silent) and I am the founder of I.M.P.! Are you a peace of shit that got yourself sent to hell? Or are you an innocent soul who got FUCKED over by someone else?!" He held up a sign that said, 'Some guy who hired us!!' With a demon guy wearing an Ohio sports jersey, giving a testimonial, "After lovingly killing my wife for FUCKING A DELIVER MAN! You could imagine my surprise when I wound up here, after the state of Ohio killed me! I really wish I could stick to that YAPPY JOGGER who saw me hiding the body!" While Blitzø is speaking to the camera and holding a grimoire, Moxxie, Millie, and Y/n are arranging lit candles on the floor in a circle.