[OLD] One Helluva Boss! (A Blitzø x reader fanfiction/Oneshots, Scenarios, etc)

Millie Ships Blitzø and Y/n (Swap/Future AU)

Millie and Moxxie are talking in the backseat.

Blitzø: What's he saying?

Millie: He's showing me the location of the key to turn off the machine. Sorry, keys. Two keys.

Blitzø: Two-man rule.

Y/n: Two-man rule?

Blitzø: Yeah, two men, two keys, like a... nuclear launch.

Millie: But, uh, to retrieve the keys, there is a vault.

Millie: And to open the vault, you need to enter Planck's constant.

Blitzø: Planck's what?

Millie: Planck's constant. It's a very famous number.

Y/n: All right, so we get the keys, and then we turn the machine off.

Millie: That's what he says.

Y/n: All right, well, that shouldn't be too hard. We can do this.

Blitzø: Y/n, did you hear the part where he said the place was like an impenetrable fortress?

Y/n: Yeah, but there has to be a way in!

Blitzø: Yeah, there is. Our military.

Y/n: Who are coming!

Blitzø: Well, we don't know that anymore because you yelled at them like it was a parent-teacher conference, and then you hung up on them, so we don't know what the hell's going on, because now we're- Wait, wait, what are we do- Oh! Wait, that's right! We're on our way to rescue our daughter from the big, bad Fourth of July celebration!

Y/n: You know what, if you can't handle this, then just turn around and drop me off first!

Blitzø: What are you gonna do!? You gonna walk back to the Pride Ring!?

Y/n: I will do anything if it gets me away from you!

Millie: Children! Children! Children! This interminable bickering was amusing at first, but it's getting very stale and we've still got a long drive ahead of us. So, why don't you two cut the horseshit and get to the part where you admit your sexual feelings for one another?

Blitzø: Whoa!

Y/n: You are way off base, Mills!

Millie: Oh, spare me, spare me, spare me! Yes, yes, he's a prude. I know. Probably reminds you of your bad relationships, and, gosh, you'd really like a nice man to settle down with, but, admit it, you're real curious to know what he's like in the sack again! And you. Ha! Well, you're just a big manbaby who'd rather act tough than show his true feelings, because the last time you opened your heart, you got hurt. Owie. And now, rather than admit these feelings, you're dancing around one another with this mind-numbing and frankly boorish mating ritual. So, please, for my sake, either quit your bickering, or pull over, tear off those clothes, and GET IT OVER WITH ALREADY!

Y/n gasps while Blitzø doesn't react, he's just frozen and stunned. Millie lets out a deep sigh.

Moxxie: What was that?

Millie: I told them they should have sex more.

Moxxie: They don't have sex much?

Millie: No.

There's a brief silence.

Moxxie snickers.

Millie chuckles.

Both start to laugh uncontrollably.

Y/n mutters.

Millie: [laughs] Oh! Oh!

Millie and Moxxie continue laughing.

(A/n: I love Stranger Things and Jopper especially, so I thought it would be fun to make a future and swap AU version of this scene specifically [Still one of my favorite scenes]. I had way to much fun making this. Thank you for reading!)