Leonardo Dicaprio Imagines

I cant fall in love

Your (p.o.v.)
Am I incapable of loving someone? I've been so close to dating guys I even dated a couple less then a month. I felt so confined and I felt like I didn't really like them after. I cringed thinking about kissing them after it happened. I didn't get the butterflies anymore. I do want to love someone. I do want to feel loved. But I feel like I can't love someone. I feel like no one can truly love me and want to be with me. Seeing my flaws and finding normal things disgusting. I don't feel normal. How can I be normal? I envy people who can be themselves around people they love/like. I almost feel like I can't truly be myself. It's hard to be me. I like guys who never like me back. It hurts so badly to like someone when they don't show the same feelings back. It's almost intriguing liking someone who doesn't like you. It's like a challenge and then when they like you back you lose the feeling. The challenge is done or you realize who they really are. You start to lose complete interest in them. Yes I know that no one is perfect but a guy can do a small little thing and bam it ruins everything. They can smell weird for one day or look sort of weird and bam my I feeling is gone. Then I start to think does the guy I like feel the same way about me? Does he think I look weird? Does he think I look fat? How can I make myself more attractive? How can I make myself feel better? It hurts