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Sixty Two

Harry Styles

Aubrey hasn't been sleeping very well for the past few days.

She doesn't know that I've caught on, even though she made it obvious the moment she started "waking up before me" every morning. This is the same girl who I used to have to physically drag out of bed to get to events and meetings on time. I know she really just isn't sleeping in the first place.

I always make sure she actually falls asleep before me at night, but she must not be out for very long. She's been wide awake the second I open my eyes for days now, which is normally at an early time by her standards.

I'm driving her back from her usual Tuesday therapy session, this being the only time we've gone out this week. Max is being nice to us because of the whole picture issue with Cara. He also knows we both aren't so happy about going out in the first place after the incident at the club. I have my gun tucked into my pants once again as a precaution, but it still doesn't feel like enough, and he understands that.

Whatever it is preventing Aubrey from sleep also made her rain check on spending time with Jade. She said it's because she thinks being around her could put her in danger with the eyes on her from whoever she's been receiving texts from, but I don't know why she's just now realizing that. I feel like it's just whatever's been bugging her that's stopping her from being around those she doesn't have to.

Her lack of sleep becomes even more evident to me when I look over and notice that she's already asleep not even two minutes into the ride, "Heavenly" by Cigarettes After Sex playing softly throughout the car per her request.

I take the time alone to think about everything that's been going on, trying to figure out which of the many inconveniences could be taking such a toll on her. The loss of Charlie, club shooting, newfound knowledge of my past, issue with Cara, or lack of any more texts could all be playing a part in this behavior.

The lack of texts from the unknown sender since that night at the club is what worries me the most. There are so many people it could be, and we both get very stressed even thinking about the possibilities. There's Cara, who I know I've asked about this all and she denied, but that means nothing. There's Louis and his odd apology he gave me last week for some unknown reason who hated Aubrey from the get-go. There's Ian the wannabe IT, which would explain the texts. There are also so many other people it could be that I haven't even begun to think about. People from our pasts, people we don't even know, and everyone in between. We both know of all of these possible suspects and have discussed them before, but there isn't enough proof to accuse any one specific person or group of people.

I see the shooting as some kind of warning, trying to prove that whoever's watching her has the power to hurt her even in a big crowd. Maybe even hurt me, too. They've already left a stain on my image that won't fade for a long time.

She misses that cat a lot more than she lets on, too. I catch her looking at pictures of him on her phone at least once a day with a sorrowful look on her face, blaming herself for all of this and wishing she could know for sure what happened to him.

I would give anything to have him following me around in the loft right now like he always used to at Aubrey's house. I hate seeing her so upset. He was one of her main reminders of Elora, and now he's been taken from her, too. She's lost so much, and there's nothing I can do to fix it without putting both of us in more danger than we already seem to be in at the moment.

I just wish there was something I could do here.

I want things to feel normal again. As normal as they can be, at least. Nothing feels normal anymore, though. We have our nice moments where we fool ourselves into feeling that sort of normalcy, but nothing is going to feel genuinely normal for a long time. Her cat is gone, she doesn't live in her own house, we can't even leave the loft without being armed in case of our stalker coming out of hiding and making their presence known, and it feels like everything has become so serious so fast.