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Thirty Three

Aubrey Hart

"And then, this girl I've never seen before came in all pissed at me for being with him! She tried to slap me!" I recall Thursday morning's events.

"What did you do?" Maggie writes a few things down in her notebook as I speak.

When I said I didn't tell anyone about Harry, that excludes my therapist. It's her job to keep secrets, so I'm not worried. She's been my therapist for years now, and she's never told anyone anything that I know of. As long as whatever I'm talking about isn't putting me or anyone else in genuine danger, she can't talk about it outside of our sessions.

"Okay, don't freak out, but I grabbed her hand and threatened to break her wrist. I obviously wouldn't have like I did that one time. I just wanted to scare her so I could leave." I explain.

"What did Harry say while all of this was going on?" She doesn't even flinch at the fact that I threatened this stranger.

"Nothing! I don't know what I expected since he's an asshole, but he just stood there! I didn't know they had some kind of thing going! I never would've slept with him if I knew that!" I rant.

"Right, right." She nods and urges me to continue.

"So I texted him that, and his only response was calling her crazy!"

"That's what they all say..." She reads my mind with a slight head shake at his words.

"Exactly!"

I'm kind of hyped whenever I get to fully rant about him. I can't with Jade because she doesn't know any of this, meaning my only venting time is during my weekly therapy sessions.

"Have you seen or talked to him since?" She asks.

"Nope! I'm avoiding him. I know I'm gonna have to see him in the next few days to at least go to lunch or something for the paps, but I don't want to. I'm pissed. I don't even entirely like the fact that I sleep with him in the first place, and now knowing that he was serious with someone else just makes me feel worse."

"What if he's telling the truth about her, though? She did pick his lock to get inside." She points out.

"If he can give me a serious explanation as to who the fuck she even is, then maybe I'll believe it. I don't trust guys who automatically resort to calling girls crazy, though. I also will never trust Harry, so there's that to add to my doubts."

"Has he tried talking to you?"

"Texted a couple times, yeah. I'm just ignoring him, though. He can sort his shit out with that girl first. Then we'll talk." I cross my arms.

"You seem to be hanging around him a lot more recently because of helping him get clean. How is that making you feel?" She pushes for more.

"I don't know, honestly," I sigh, "You'd think I'd hate it and decline all of his requests to come over, but it really isn't half bad. I don't just mean because of sleeping with him on occasion. Most of the time when I go over there, we barely even talk. He just asks me to sit there with him and do nothing."

"Why?"

"You're the therapist. You tell me." I shrug.

"I mean, has he said anything that gives you an explanation as to why he's always calling you out of all people?"

"He said I make it shut off." I fiddle with my rings as I admit it.

"You what?"

"His brain. I guess whenever he wants to relapse or something, me being around makes the urge to do drugs shut off. Fuck if I know why, that's just what he told me and I didn't want to push it." I explain to her.