Chapter59

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Zarah..
Two weeks later...
For the past two weeks, Abdul and I haven't spoken to each other. Everyone seems to be blaming me, and I feel like I'm at a loss, unsure of where to turn. It hurts to see everyone siding with him. That night, he went out, and I have no idea where he went, but I'm certain he didn't sleep at home.

"The next day, his mother scolded him severely. I'm not sure who told her about his whereabouts, but I'm sure it wasn't Sufyan. She's been questioning me repeatedly about whether we had a fight, but I keep telling her we didn't. Despite this, they've postponed the wedding. It's currently Thursday, and the marriage is scheduled to take place tomorrow morning at 1:30 pm, right after the Zuhr prayer, God willing.

"Lately, I've lost my appetite and become withdrawn, unlike my usual self. I've found solace in studying and thinking, making them my new hobbies. We'll be starting our exams soon, and I'm trying to focus on that."

"Abdul hasn't made any effort to repair our relationship, barely speaking to me when I'm around. In fact, whenever he sees me, he becomes silent. So, with the house being quite noisy, I retreated to my room to read. Suddenly, I heard a knock at the door. I stood up to open it, expecting it to be someone else, but to my surprise, it was Abdul. I raised my head to look at him, but he avoided eye contact, walking in and placing the food plate he was holding on the table.

"He opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it again. After two weeks of absence, he entered my room, searching for something in the drawer. Finally, he pulled out a paper, wrote a message, and placed it in front of the plate. Then, he walked out without a word. I took a deep breath, and a single tear escaped my eye, which I quickly wiped away. I approached the table, picked up the food and the paper, and read the message: 'Don't let what happened affect the baby, please eat, not for my sake, but for Allah's sake.'

"It seems all he cares about is the baby. I forced myself to eat three spoonfuls of rice and drank some water. I longed to visit Aunt Ramla's house, but I didn't know how to escape this tense atmosphere..."

"I've made up my mind, and I won't be asking Abdul for permission. I promise I won't even speak to him first. I'll go straight to Ummi, and that's final. I got out of bed, took a bath, and changed into a long gown. I packed my hair into a bun, wrapped my veil, and walked out of my room, heading straight to hers. I greeted her with a Sallam and entered the room, where I find Abdul lying on Ummi's lap, looking unwell. Sufyan is also present, and Abdul didn't even glance at me, his eyes fixed on something else.

"I greeted Ummi and find a place to sit, fidgeting with my fingers. She looked at me with a warm smile, and I bowed my head, calling out to her, 'Ummi, I want to go see my sister.'"

"Come here," she said, gesturing for me to stand up. I forced a smile as I rose to my feet, while Abdul tried to stand up, likely to leave the room.

Ummi hold his hand, saying, "Aradtu an tasqut maratan ukhraa" (You want to fall again?). He added, "Ummi, I won't fall," trying to reassure her. Abdul attempted to walk out, but she called out his name, "Come back here!" She echoed, "Come back and sit down, you both are going to answer me today. Since I started noticing the tension between you two..."

Ummi turned to Sufyan, saying, "Idha kadhabat ealiun" (If you lie to me), and he looked up from his phone, his eyes widening. Ummi, I don't know what happened between them. I just noticed they haven't been talking to each other, and when I tried to ask Abdul about it, he wouldn't tell me anything. He lied."

"Come here," Ummi said, and he replied, "Ummi, I'm coming, let me just pick up this call." Sufyan walked out immediately.

Ummi asked, "What's going on between you two? You've fought, right?" We both remained silent. She asked again, "I'm asking you for the last time, my friend , will you answer me?"

Abdul muttered from his lying position, "Ummi, nothing like that has happened. We didn't fight, we aren't fighting." Ummi pressed on, "Zanci ubanka, will you tell me the truth or not?" But Abdul just shook his head, leaving me speechless.

"I'll give you both five minutes to sort everything out." Ummi said,She walked out of the room, and I glanced at Abdul with the corner of my eye. He just closed his eyes.

"We remained quiet for several minutes. I took a deep breath and decided to speak, my voice barely above a whisper. "I'm sorry. I finally admit it... though I feel like crying for doing so. This guy is driving me crazy, and I feel like I can't do without him." I fiddled with my fingers, my eyes fixed on Abdul. He didn't look up or respond, his eyes still closed. I knew he heard me, but his silence hurt.

"Abdul, you're ignoring me," I said, trying to keep my emotions in check. After a few minutes, he finally replied, his voice soft and gentle, "Am I?" His innocent face melted my heart, and as he opened his eyes to look at me, I realized how much I loved and missed him.

"You can't just ignore me, Abdul! You can't keep acting cold towards me! For goodness' sake, I'm your wife!" I exclaimed, my emotions raw.

"Oh, are you?" he retorted, his tone sarcastic. "

But I'm trying to be patient," I continued, my voice cracking. "Yes, and I'm terribly sorry for everything that happened. I'm sorry for hurting you... I didn't mean to, honestly. And I understand it is my fault, but you have to accept that it was yours too."

He scoffed. "Mine? Seriously?"

I stood my ground, my voice firm. "Yes, Abdul, it's your fault for not understanding me, for cheating on me, for being disloyal to our marriage."

I took a deep breath, my words pouring out. "I've been saying sorry to you since that day, but all you do is ignore me... You're treating me in a way that I can't even put into words. Stop acting so cold! Shout at me, at least I'll feel less guilty. You're not only hurting yourself, but you're also hurting me, Abdul."

"I'm not hurting myself by hurting you," he scowled.

"Yes, you are," I snapped, my voice firm.

"Abdul, why are you like this?" I asked, staring at him. He stared back at me for a while before extending his hand, beckoning me to come closer. I stood up and walked towards him, and he pulled me into his embrace. I could feel the heat radiating from his body; he is burning with a high fever.

"Abdul, you..." I started to say, but he silenced me by placing his finger on my lips. I laid my head on his chest, closing my eyes as a single tear escaped.

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