Becoming Undone [1/2] [✔]

Twelve

Meredith's POV

Why did Teddy hang up the phone? Does she hate me that much? How long has it been since I last saw her? Nine, no ten days. I really don't know who else to turn to now. I have Arizona's number so I could ring her I suppose but I don't trust her the same way I trust Teddy. I know my call log has been filled up with their missed calls but what if they are only pretending to care? What if they only pretended to call to cover their backs, after all Teddy did hang up so she can't care too much. 

I didn't intend to run away for so long. I freaked out. It scared me how Teddy knew and then Arizona knew and then I just blurted out my secrets. I couldn't just stay in the on-call room sleeping, I had to leave. I had started to have a panic attack just after they had left the room and I knew I had to leave the hospital and then I just left.

I took as much money out of my bank as I could and I left town. I hated feeling so weak and vulnerable, everyone was going to start looking at me differently so I had to leave. It made so much sense. Right up until it didn't which was about 3 days ago.

I was staying in a hotel. I paid for everything by cash so the police couldn't track me but I'm pretty sure nobody back home would of rung the police. Why would they care if I left? No one even liked me.

Soon enough though, I ran out of money and I couldn't risk going to the bank again. So I left the hotel and just stayed on the streets for a couple of nights, until a guy met me. He took me back to his place. It was pretty obvious he was drunk but I was so cold at this point I didn't care what he wanted to do to me. I just wanted to be in the warmth of a building.

Unfortunately, the next morning. He had sobered up. I hadn't eaten much the whole time I had been missing so I must of lost weight and I was definitely cutting myself regularly. My life is a disaster. When this guy saw me with his sober eyes, he laughed at me. He started to beat me up saying how if I had wanted to kill myself, that he could do it quicker. He told me I was ugly. I made myself ugly. He eventually kicked me out of the flat.

It was midday so I started to run away from it. I was so dizzy, I couldn't carry on. I stopped when I reached a field and sat on the grass and reached for my phone. My breathing was becoming so staggered and laboured. I turned it on for the first time in 10 days. I had over 300 missed calls from various people from the hospital but I only wanted Teddy.

I found her phone number and pressed "ring".

"T.. Teddy? I need your help. Please."

The line went dead. I'm sure I heard her breathing. Did she hate me?

Why did the line go dead? Will Meredith be okay? Hope you liked!