Can't Help but Love Him

I love you

     "No, you're the miracle Mrs. John- I mean Anne. I really can't imagine what you've both been put through, and I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. But, I'm glad you kept going. For him, I mean. I don't think he'd be the person he is today without you." I assure her. 

     "Thank you-" She stops mid-sentence, and smiles. "Eat more food, love! There are scones in the back, if you prefer those." She says, suddenly changing the subject. 

     I take another biscuit, confused beyond belief. She had switched up in seconds, completely hiding any pain or emotion that lay in her eyes. I really had no idea what was going on. 

     That is, until Axel cracked the door open, peeking into the room. What, had she sensed him coming? She continued to talk to me, pretending not to notice him standing in the doorway.  

     "Do you have something to say, son?" She says, not once looking up at the door. This was beyond Mom instinct, she one-hundred percent had a built in radar. She was an impressive woman. 

     "Ma, he didn't come here from London for you." He mumbled, avoiding eye contact. I had never seen him this submissive before, towards anyone. I kind of liked it.

     "All right then, fine! You take him! Your father will not be home until eight so do your best to entertain him until then." She huffs, taking the last sip of her drink. Relief crossed his face as he waved me over from the door. I thanked Mrs. Johnson for the food, and hurried to his side.

     "Oh, Axel." She says, just before we leave. "You know I cannot lie to your father. So, if you plan on having him stay the night, you mustn't let anyone know about it." She implies, keeping her eyes on her hands.

     "Sneaky sleepover, got it. Bye Ma!" He says, grabbing my hand and running down the hallway.

     "Woah hold on, why are we running?" I ask, leveling out my pace.

     "What if she changes her mind and wants to talk to you more? We have to escape while we can!" He whisper-shouts. He pulls me into an elevator, pressing the highest floor button. I couldn't help but snicker at his uncollected behavior, it really made me want to spend more time with him. 

     I wrapped my hands around his waist, pressing my lips against his cheek. It always took him a moment to react, before he'd instinctively push me against the wall. I hadn't meant to turn this into something, at least not right now. We were in a glass elevator, after all. 

     His hands slid up my back, lifting my shirt along with it. He kept eyes open, softly biting my bottom lip. Regardless of how exposed we were, I didn't want to stop. It felt good, I hadn't had the feeling of his body for a long time. 

      "I missed you," He repeated, leaning his forehead against mine. I kissed the top of his head, stroking his hair.

     "I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you." I decide. "I won't leave you alone, even if you want me to." 

     "That's a promise, Jay. Promise you won't leave me." He whispered. 

     "Are you kidding me? There's still a whole bunch I don't know about you. You're completely spontaneous and your personality changes every five minutes. I want to know everything. I'll stay with you until I've learned every microscopic piece of information about you, no exceptions." I informed him, watching his eyes light up as I spoke.

     He looked down away from me, attempting to hide the dark red color in his cheeks. I felt kind of proud I was finally able to alter his emotions, considering he was usually the one who had control over mine. It made sense though; he had been put through a lot of meaningless physical relationships. I bet none of the women loved him for him.

     "I can probably fill in a few knowledge gaps for you." He said, releasing me. I didn't necessarily want him to let go yet, but the words he had said before, 'sleepover' came to mind. I remembered waking up to his arms around me, and I was eager to feel that again. 

     "Your mom spent some time filling me in on your childhood, but I want to know the details from your perspective." I say, feeling the elevator stop.

     "What? Wait, what did she tell you?" He asked, suddenly on edge.

     The elevator doors opened, but Axel stayed staring at me in his tense position. 

     "Just a little about your family, I guess. Nothing big." I lied, measuring his expression. I wanted to see how much he would tell me, and if their stories didn't line up for whatever reason. Was there something he didn't want me to know? I had already made it clear that I was going to find out everything about him. 

     He could see the determination in my eyes, and sighed. "Yeah, ok I'll tell you about it later then." 

     The elevator beeped, then door closed. He went to open the doors again, but it began to descend back to the first floor. 

     "Are there people who use your elevators besides your mom?" I asked, looking out the glass window. 

     He didn't say anything, just stood frozen in place. I could see the color slowly drain from his face.

     "She... she warned us and everything. He's here. He came back early. How did I miss her signal...?" He muttered to himself, eyes wide.

     "Axel? Wait, what's going on? Who's using the elevator?" I ask, slight panic rising in my chest.

     "My mom. She can't talk if he tells her not too. I didn't pick up the signal." He repeated, swaying back into the wall. "My dad's here, Jason. He's going to kill the both of us." He exaggerated. I looked nervously out the window, but couldn't see the lowest floor yet.

     "If he was mad before, now he'll send us to Hell and back. I was going to wait until I did the proper paperwork, so I could get my accounts running again. But it's no use, he already knows about us." He said.

     "You can still walk away from this, right? Come back with me, I can pay for the necessities with my current account until I-" 

     "No, you don't understand. He's a business giant. He could choose a random persons life anywhere in the world right now and absolutely destroy it. There's nothing we can do against him. Please, don't try. I don't want to see him hurt you." He murmurs.

     I could get why he was saying this; he had been worn down by his fathers intimidation for his entire life. The last time he'd stood up to his father, he was sent half way across the world against his will. I had to admit he was right, there was nothing we could do against him.

     "But I love you, I can't just go. I can't just drop it saying we'll never work." I insist, fighting back the tears welling up in my eyes.

     "I love you more, which is why I can let you go. He'd ruin you, Jason. Leave you with nothing." He said.

     "This is happening too fast, I mean I just got to see you again." I wouldn't be able to handle it, a week without him had totaled me. I don't know how long it'd be until I saw him again if we parted ways now. My dreams were crumbling to pieces, my dream of being with him forever.

     He pushes the emergency stop button, pulling me out of the elevator when it opened. "Take the stairs towards the back. I'll... I'll meet you at a Hotel a few blocks down called The Wayfarer, okay? Just let me resolve this with him alone." He pleaded, frantically hugging me. 

     I didn't like this hug. It felt like a goodbye hug, like he was ready to sacrifice himself. Even so, all I could do was trust him. He jumped back in the elevator, looking outside its window.

     I tried my hardest not to tear up, watching the doors close. "I love you." He mouthed, then he was gone.