Blue Ribbon

Chapter 13 - Yes and no

"There is one who you belong to,
Whose love- there is no song for.
And though you know it's wrongful,
There is someone else you long for."

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Lilly's POV

"What do you mean you didn't find him?"

The words and the furiousness that followed them had me snapping my head toward dad's direction as he talked through the phone. My heart seized and panic rushed through my chest as I understood who he must be talking about.

"Roman, don't make me lose my mind now," He snapped and got to his feet, he rushed a hand over his face, "I don't care...I told you...Roman, I am so gonna kill you," He threatened frustrated as he listened to whatever uncle Roman must've said. He cursed something under his breath, "He is just a fucking professor, where would he hide, huh?"

Oh my god...what did I do again?

He listened to whatever Roman was saying and his gaze drifted and fell on me, his gaze cautious and calculating, and I couldn't miss the flicker of blame in them, like he knows it's all my fault. I did this again. I gave him the chance to escape; I could swear dad felt it.

He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, and his gaze flickered away from me, "Yeah, I know, Emma told me she got here an hour ago," He added, "Yeah, well, sometimes she knows how to do things better than you," He added with a roll of his eyes.

What should I do? How can I fix this?

"No, they'll do the surgery tomorrow," He said with a tired sigh, "Okay, keep me updated."

My hand shook so I curled into a fist, trying my best not to expose my panic and fear. He hung up and I let my gaze drift away from him and around. Mom and auntie Katherine were talking about something, mostly discussing Max and his situation. Chase had left last night since he had a flight, and said he'll be back today. That other man disappeared this morning and I haven't seen him since, which is great, he better just make the surgery, save my brother, and leave.

The sound of footsteps nearing shook me out of that thought and had me turning my head. My gaze fell on dad, his eyes on me only and before I could say a thing, his hand curled over my wrist, pulling me up from my seat. My eyes widened at his sudden action, "Come here," He mumbled, his voice more of a hiss as he dragged me away.

My breath caught in my throat and fear consumed me whole. I never thought I'd be scared of him, I never expected to reach a stage where my own dad causes me fear, but here I am. He paused to a stop when we were far away from mom and he faced me, his voice was normal but behind each word was a sense of warning, "You told him, didn't you?"

I stared back at him, silent and terrified of his reaction. My lack of words had him turning his gaze away, the muscles of his jaw worked and I knew he was trying his best to stay calm, "I was being sarcastic when I said it, but," He looked back at me and rubbed a frustrated hand over his chin, "But you actually went and warned him, didn't you?"

How could I say it, without having him hate me more? How could I explain everything? God, I am terrified of his hate. That raged look in his eyes looks so much like hate and blame. He said he won't forgive me, if I tell him this now, how could he ever forgive me?

My lips parted, ready to talk, but words clogged my throat. I felt my eyes watering and I mumbled, "Dad, I..."

"Don't lie again, Lilly, don't you dare lie," He warned, his words strict, "Roman looked into his phone calls; you called him," My heart stopped beating, "I know you called him, and then he just disappeared, what did you tell him?"