Chapter Thirty-One

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~Flashback~
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I remembered the night we talked by our windows.

She said she couldn't sleep because her pasts kept haunting her and jolting her awake, compared it to a nightmare so she wanted to have some company through the night.

She told me lots of things about herself at that moment, like where and how she lived before becoming a teacher. In those hours I noticed that she didn't want to be one, that it was not her dream but her deceased mother's she was left to accomplish. When she did become one, she didn't exactly hate it, thought it was decent but never thought that was where she truly belongs.

Karlene stared at the starless sky thinking, her mind full of imaginations. "When the time comes and I have to quit teaching, I'll probably start a business..." She shrugged as she spoke sounding unsure, then shifted her gaze to me. "Ellie, what do you think? You think I could do it?"

"What can't you do? Honestly..."

She might fool me making me think that she's new to this business thing, but I'm pretty sure she told me about it before, how she already saved enough money to start it, already researched it and have a clear plan about it... I think she just needs a little push and support.

"There's a high enough chance that it'll be popular in this town, I-I can use my page, I already have a page and followers for that!" She said excitedly. "And for the delivery, I could easily do that pshhh~ I have a car."

See? She even have a page, who make pages for nothing? Pfft~ She just needs a push, and she'll start it, trust me.

"But what if it flops, right? L-like what if they don't like my recipe? Shit..." She bit her finger nails, brainstorming.

"It's not gonna flop, you idiot." Seeing her stressed was making me stressed too. "If it does flop, then Evan and I would buy all of it, I would even recommend it to my relatives, god... They love cookies."

After a few minutes of her ranting about all the negatives and positives her future company would bring, the subject landed on me. She asked what was my plan after graduation, and to be honest, I have no idea, no dreams to chase, I felt like I didn't even knew myself that moment. What do I want to happen in my life? What are my interests? I asked myself for I didn't know where my life would lead me.

"I'm still waiting for a sign..." Hopefully, it'll come sooner. "My family said they'd support me on whatever track I would take."

It was true, they said I could go to college (though, I couldn't choose a specific course that I wanted ), or  they could take me in their company, start as their assistant or something, then they'll teach me all the way up (not sure if I wanted to spend my life in an office like them). That was me,  No plan at all...  Now sitting across Karlene felt uneven. I admired her passion on doing the things she loved, while she talked about it her eyes sparkled like stars, and even if the sky above us bear none, it wasn't as dull because in those moments it felt like I was face to face with one million stars combined.

I wonder why I couldn't shine like her, what would it take to...?

"You are so lucky, Ellie. You still have your family..." she said. "I don't. And it's pretty miserable if I were to say."

I didn't know what to tell her so I stayed quiet and let her have her moment to speak out all that has been kept hidden in her chest.

"All alone in a house that was supposed to be a home for a family-" she sighed. "Just fucking sucks- it's depressing, all this space I had been left with! We were supposed to move in, me and my dad. Then a stupid accident happened— it screwed me over!"

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