Touch Her And... (Completed)

Chapter: 55

He saw Rik going out stealthily. He knew where he was going. Which meant everyone was allowed to see her, talk to her except for him. But giving up was not in his nature. He grew up to become rebellious. He was too stubborn for his own good. So when he decided on something, that's that. It had to be the way he planned. That's what made him famous or rather, infamous.

Reacting irrationally was never his personality but Teressa, she played with his nerves and always tended to bring out the worst out of him. No matter how hard he tried to be collected, one look at her and he went batshit crazy. The day he woke up in the hospital was one such. That day he saw everything, he saw her falling into the waterfall. He died a thousand times seeing her that way. He died the moment he realized he was the reason for everything.

Calling his secretary he informed him to manage everything on his own for the coming week, unless there is an emergency. Probably for the first time in forever. Because all he could think of was how she might be feeling really comfortable around Rik, Manik and even Arjun. How she might be doing totally fine without him. As if on cue his hand went inside his pocket and brought out the silver cigarette case. His brain cells needed a push.

Cross legged, he was half seated, supporting his back on the edge of his study table. The sleeves of the black shirt he wore were rolled up to his elbow. His left arm wrapped around his chest kept supporting the right one by its elbow, which in turn held the cigarette between its middle and forefinger. His usually gelled and neatly back brushed hair seemed a little messy today, the rigid veins on his arms, the slight stubble on his face, the clenched jaw and the furrowed eyebrows explained how he was not okay.

This room had so many memories of that troublesome girl. The whole mansion was filled with her still lingering fragrance. How could he not miss the precious moments when he found her running around the lawns after Nilu and Bruno, or when she watered the flowers outside as if they were her own, or when he found her sleeping on the chair at the dining table, too tired to keep her eyes open until he returned. Many a days, he stood there and kept staring at her peacefull and innocent face, while letting her sleep.

"You did this again? Why can't you just wake me up Dev?!" He remembered her complaining so many times. If only she knew, how much he craved looking at her face the whole day, that returning back to her sleeping figure meant the world to him. He could watch her like that forever. Seeing her face was always so calming and seeing her smile at him was like an addiction. He could never get enough of it.

The way her eyes sparkled with happiness every time she saw him entering the house or bringing something for her on his way back home, made his day. How she used to get elated even at the sight of the tiniest things he brought her. He could never return empty handed after he realized how much this small gesture meant to her. Every time he opened the door with the sole hope of seeing that pure emotion.These were the moments he was living for.

For a rude introvert like him, she was nothing less than a gallaxy full of stars. The literal girl of his dreams. They never needed to use words to define what they felt for each other, their's was a relation beyond mere alphabets. He knew, one touch of her and his long frozen heart would melt into water. He never needed to give her that access, she took it on her own right. He was hers from the day he opened his eyes.

Now looking around the room all he could see was this impenetrable void. The same old suffocating feeling where he needed to build an invisible wall around him. There was no one to barge into his room without his permission, there was no one waiting out there for him to return, no one to pull him into that safe embrace whenever he would have the nightmares. The house lost its life, he lost his soul.

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A loud knock on the door drew him out of his endless thoughts. He threw the cigarette into the ashtray and almost unwillingly went to the door. There stood Pratima ji.

"You could've given me a call. How many times did I say that you're aging and you shouldn't be climbing the stairs this much." He scolded.

"I called. But as you didn't pick up, I thought of bringing the dinner upstairs." Pratima ji responded. He immediately brought his cell phone out of his pocket. It had some fourteen missed calls. Three of which said "Pratima ji". He clenched his eyes and dragged his fingers through his hair.

"If my apology still means anything to anyone at all, then I'm sorry. You can leave the food here." He said sincerely, looking at the floor.

Pratima ji slowly entered and placed the food on the bedside table.

"Won't you change into something else, you are wearing it from the afternoon." She said looking at his clothes.

"Um.. yes. I'll do that." He nodded but Pratima ji knew him well enough to know when he lied.

"You won't eat the food, will you?" She asked cautiously but he decided not to respond to the question. Pratima ji understood and started leaving when the words he whispered stopped her on her tracks.

"Its suffocating to not have her around, isn't it, Pratimaji?" He uttered standing at the same spot like a tall statue. Pratima ji slowly turned around and came close to him.

She slowly placed her hand on his shoulder.

"To me it's sad, but if it is suffocating to you of all people, that obviously means you depended on her more than we could ever imagine." Pratima ji acknowledged.

He stood still, one could only see his Adam's apple moving up and down, forcefully swallowing the pain that was impossible hide anymore.

"Why don't you go and bring her back yourself ? She cares for you a lot Dev, I have seen it in her eyes. You can rely on my experience." Pratima ji patted his shoulder affectionately. He didn't respond for a few seconds but then he blurted the words out.

"My rage, I don't seem to have any control over it when it comes to her. I don't know what I have become? This is so not me. I can't even relate to my composed older version anymore. This version of me is always restless, worried and insecure. What if I do something even more gruesome this time? What if she chooses the same alternative." He clenched his jaw.

"What alternative are you talking about?" Pratima ji asked curiously. But he could never tell her the answer, so he immediately changed the subject.

"Has Manik returned yet?" He said, building that wall around him again.

"No, he called. They will eat outside." Pratima ji replied.

"Who they?" Clenching his jaw, the deep voice asked.

"He, Pihu, Ritwik and .... Teressa." She answered unknowingly turning the restricted switch on.

"You can leave now." He said without any particular expression but Pratima ji could sense the sudden change in his demeanor. Although she left without uttering another word.

The very moment she left, he kicked the door closed behind her and turned around. His eyes fell on the plate of food and he broke into a fit of fury.

Seething, he lifted the plate and threw it on the floor infront of him. He growled in pain, thumping on the wall with both of his hands and stood that way. A few months back if someone said that they would like to wait for him at the dining table until he returned, he would've immediately felt uncomfortable and rejected the offer. He loved being alone.

But now, everything had changed. His cold heart got habituated of her warm presence. He wanted nothing more than having her back at the mantion, all to himself. The mere thought of sharing her attention burned him from inside. It was like a frenzy. A frenzy that started controlling him. No power on earth could seize her away from him anymore. He could bring hell and heaven together to get her back to himself. And he knew he never wanted anything or anyone this bad. What's his would remain his, no matter how evil that made him look like.

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A/N
Yay! The longest chapter by far . I hope you like it.

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Love, Puja. ❤