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Dream, after having a nosebleed: Welp. Time to wash the blood off my hands.
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Ink: All of a sudden I got a random burst of energy, and I think it's my body's last hurrah before it completely shut down.
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Ink: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.
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Teaching PJ and Stain animals, their second rewrite in.
Blue: What does the doggy say? Bow wow.
Dream: What does the kitty say? Meow meow.
Lust: What does the moo-cow say? Moo-
Cross: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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Ink: So, Dream is no longer allowed to take the trash out at night.
Blue: Why?
Ink: Because I've caught him trying to train raccoons to fight five times in a row.
Dream, arms crossed and pouting: You'll be thanking me when the third raccoon battalion saves your ass.
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Dream: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like... a lawyer to you. Ok?
Blue: Okay.
*later*
Lust: Blue! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble.
Dream, whispering: Deny everything.
Blue, loudly: That isn't a chair.
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When they were trying to figure out who Cross is seeing.
Blue: How are we supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Cross without him noticing?Lust: Hey, Cross, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny.
Cross: *takes and swallows tracker* Pay up, loser.
Blue: ...
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When Dream asked Cross if he could marry Ink in a past rewrite.
Dream: But what about Ink? They were my SOULMATE!
Cross: You said that about a ball of yarn once!
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Dream: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me.
Blue: But they said not to touch the masterpieces.
Dream: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall.
Ink, on a walkie talkie: This is Ink, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.
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That one rewrite Blue was obsessed with crashing weddings. On the simps and Ink's wedding day.
Dream: If any person here knows of any just cause or impediment why these two should not be joined together in holy matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.
Blue: Yes! I do. One of the partners is already married! They married me three years ago. And don't let them deny it! I've got the marriage certificate to prove it!
*Ink turns around to face them*
Blue: Oh... sorry. Wrong church.
YOU ARE READING
Sans Au One-shots
FanfictionSo this is based on my Multiverse. These will be short stories based on either ships or small things that can't be turned into full-on stories. There will be Angst, Fluff, and lemons. They will include my three own Aus: Leo, Green, and Sage. So yeah...
