A son's first hero
Akira's POV
My Little Light,
No matter how much you may try to hide it, I am greatly aware of the fact that I am not the father you wish for. Trust me, I am as disheartened with the fact as you are.
How did it come to this, my child? I promised myself to do better than my father. I thought I was doing good with you and Hikari.
Did it happen so slowly that I never noticed? I know I made you wait. I always thought I would have time to make it up, that you would wait for your father as you used to when my travels. Remember, how you would run to my arms as soon you saw me?
Trust me, little light, there is nothing more in this world that I love more than you and your sister. You two are a part of me. My love for you two is probably the most selfish action I allowed myself to take.
It made me selfish. When I held you for the first time, you were so tiny, so fragile with your chubby features and stubbornly clenched fists. I was so, so afraid for you, my child.
I was afraid that one day they'll take you away from me, they'll strip you off of your innocence and send you to play the toy soldiers in a never-ending war.
I was afraid because the same had been done to me. To my friends. To my father.
The death, the horror, the guilt I had experienced made me hate myself. I don't wish it upon my foulest enemy, let alone my own flesh and blood.
So I promised myself that my children will not be forced to fight a war that wasn't theirs. I tried hard, so hard to achieve peace. And No matter how shaky its foundations became, I held on.
Because letting go would mean ordering my people to walk into the jaws of death. Not my children maybe, but someone's children definitely.
But I guess your father was foolish. The hellish fate I had tried to escape followed me to the present.
I know you blame me for Torhild's death. And you are right. It is my fault. I was the coward leader who didn't retaliate. I was the one who decided to give Lilura another chance. You can keep blaming me.
You know, my Sun-forged, I still can't help but hold onto the flickering hope that you will be waiting for me when I come back this time. But I know you won't. You haven't done it since I missed the play where you were supposed to play the hero. You didn't play the role, did you?
Nothing hurts me more than the fact that you walked away from the chance of being the hero you always wanted to be.
Why didn't you ever say anything, Akira? Why did you not complain like a normal child? Throw a tantrum? Why did you plaster a smile and wish me luck every time I had to leave for something I had deemed more important than you?
We used to be best friends. So why did you think you couldn't express your resentment to me?
I am sorry, my son.
It's okay, you don't have to forgive me. I don't deserve it.
Just know that I will always love you, no matter what you do, no matter what you become.
Your father.
I stare at the letter for a long time through blurry vision.
A letter? He couldn't have come personally to say this?
YOU ARE READING
A Fairytale In The Making
FantasyShe grew up in the clutches of poverty; He was raised in the lap of luxury. She hated nobles; He couldn't be bothered with commoners. Her heart hidden deep in thorny vines; His one burning in his sleeves. She was the recently orphaned flower seller;...
