Deranged // Taekook

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Jungkook's hands shook by his side as he stood distantly from the small group of people who were waiting for the bus. He was taking a big leap today and he was beginning to wonder if he should back out and just go to a library or a coffee shop.

'No, no, it's fine'

But the more he thought about it, the more disgusted he became. The bus is dirty and there's so many unpredictable people that ride it. Something terrible could happen to him. But he had prepared for the dirtiness, bringing a plastic cover with him for him to sit on, however, he brought nothing to protect him from the people. His hands were shaking so he stuffed them inside his pockets, shutting his eyes tight as he tried to will down the nausea that was rising with his anxiety.

'You'll be fine'

He studied the traffic and the hours in which the bus is busy beforehand so he knew that now the traffic was moderately busy and the bus wouldn't be as full. He planned to sit near the front, barely in the middle so it would decrease the chance of someone sitting beside him. Most people aimed for a seat in the back or the very front, they wouldn't walk from the front to sit in the middle and they wouldn't be willing to make the shameful walk from the back so they'd settle with sitting with someone if the back got full.

Plus, if Jungkook popped his earbuds in and stared out the window, his all-black attire and dark demeanour would hopefully scare people away from wanting to sit with him.

But if it came down to it, then he'd get off at the next stop.

He could see the bus now. It was at the stoplight on his left. His heart was hammering against his chest as the vehicles at the light began to move forward. The bus crept forward until the breaks began to squeal as it stopped directly in front of him. The doors opened and he took a step forward.

Bile rose in the back of his throat and his steps faltered as the confidence he tried to build caved in. He took a step backwards, suddenly fully aware that he was about to board a filthy bus. He'd be stuck in there with people breathing all around him, looking at him. He'd sit on a seat that probably hasn't been cleaned in months...years.

"If you're just going to stand there, get out of the way." Said someone, but Jungkook barely heard it.

It was hard to hear anything as the beating of his heart bellowed in his ears and muffled every other sound around him.

Time slowed and Jungkook's stomach flipped upside down. It felt as though something exploded in his head and he closed his eyes as the sun suddenly became too bright. Nausea, migraine, palpitation. All noise was drowned out and Jungkook felt as though he were sinking into the black abyss behind his eyes.

And then suddenly, reality crashed back over him like a wave. Noise exploded around him: cars, horns, talking. The brightness faded away into the city's usual dullness. And his heart had stopped so that a cold, everlasting chill settled around his body.

He felt something hard — metal, maybe — against the small of his back.

"Walk."

_____ _____ _____ _____

Taehyung was disgusted by himself.

He stared at the picture in his gallery, wondering what came over him the night he took it. It was a picture of Jungkook. He was sleeping, having kicked and pulled the hot duvet off of him. Why had he taken it?

He's been allowing Jungkook to stay at his house since Jimin and Seokjin were on their ass and he wasn't ready to give in just yet.