Angels | Ghosts Of The Past 2 [BoyxBoy] ✓

29. Death

Chase.

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I light the blunt Wayne got me and take a hit. I can't wait for the joy to replace the sorrow I'm feeling. I've been ignoring Sky's calls. I've been ignoring dad's calls all the same. I haven't gone home in two days now. Not since that morning with Sky. Dad's worried sick probably but I just can't face anyone. Sky probably told him about me. I feel queasy just thinking about that. 

"Yo, Chasey." Lucas wraps his arm around me. 

I frown and pull away. He hasn't been to a party in ages. When I see him in the hall he usually ignores me. Why is he talking to me?

"YOu ruined my fucking life, dawg!" He laughs. He's plastered. "I knew you would! I knew it from the second you came in! You're just a fucking life stealer, that's what you are!" He gives me shove. 

"I never meant to, okay? I've just—" 

"I don't care! I wish.. you had never been born." He smiles and walks away. 

I decide to ignore him.

I look down at my blunt.

I have been doing a lot of weed lately. I've noticed it doesn't take as much effect as it used to. I guess I'm just used to it now.. 

I grab another beer and chug it down.

"What are you doing sitting down? Get on the dance floor!" Wayne grabs my shoulders and pulls me up. 

"I'm really not in the mood." 

"Shut uuup!" 

He pulls me to the floor anyway. I just stand there while everyone around me dances and jumps around. 

I feel like a fish out of water. 

Wayne starts dancing with this girl. I sigh and go back to the table. 

"Hey, manski," Alex hands me a drink. 

I gobble it down. "Hi." 

"Why so glum?" 

I sigh and shrug. 

"I've got just the thing. Come on,"

I follow Alex into a dark hallway. 

He grabs a small plastic bag filled with pills from his pocket. 

"What's that?" 

"Edible joy." He smirks. "The first one is free." 

"Is it safe?" I ask even though somewhere in my mind I don't really care.

"Of course. Only the best for my bro."

He places a pink pill in my palm and hands me a cup of water. 

I put the pill in my mouth and wash it down with water. 

There's excitement in Alex' eyes. He's curious to see what I'll be like. 

"This isn't like, some weird truth drug, right?"

"Of course not." He pats my back and opens the door to the party. 

We go back inside. 

I sit on the bench again, watching everyone have fun. I wish I could have fun. But life has just been hellish sober. I'm always drunk or high. And I'm not doing it to hurt myself. If anything, this keeps me from hurting myself. It's what keeps me here. I thought last year was the worst year of my life. With Sky getting Loren pregnant and then choosing to be with Aron. I had no idea what was in store for me. Every time I think things get better they just seem to get worse.