A Wolf's Tear

forty: scapegoat

Eliza’s death continued to mock Nathaniel. Her cold, dead body lay under a blanket. And while Jacob’s tears had subsided only a minute go, he now looked like was about to faint. He had never heard this kind of silence and how it was so loud. His wolf cried inside of him while he stewed silently.

He puts his arm over Jacob’s shoulders, unwilling to let him go.

“They threatened her. It was she stayed and raise us or her whole family gets hurt. I never even knew mom had a family. She has two brothers. Gordon and Liam. They have to know that she… They need to know.”

He pursed his lips. So many secrets hidden for what? Nathaniel grimaced. They kept secrets to muzzle him. Just like what they did to Winston’s father, paid to keep their silence. To keep their truth from ever reaching the light.

His grandparents made it their mission to eliminate every single side of frailties and that included families.

“We will, Jake. We’ll find them together, okay?” He reassures him. But that did little to nothing as Jacob’s cheeks were once again drenched in tears.

“I just learned the truth and now she’s gone. I never got to apologize for the mean, nasty shit I told her. She did everything for us, for me. Risking her life to have me in this world. She had the chance to reconnect with her family if she agreed to terminate me but she didn’t. I was the reason why she was alone, right? It’s my fault. If I didn’t attack that wolf then-”

“Jacob, listen to me.” Nathaniel lowers his face to him. “You are not at fault at any of this.”

“But I am, Nate. I get away with too much shit so easily. I don’t know what's wrong with me but I hate myself.” Jacob looks at him. “Don’t you hate me? Hate me, please. I killed mom.”

It was painful to watch Jacob hunched over, his body convulsing with every sob.

After failing as a mate, he’d seen what being alone looks like, and for years, Jacob had to go through it. Now he had no intention of failing as a brother. His hand patted Jacob’s hair. At every moment he could take, smothering his brother with affection and brotherly love. He missed the times he bonded with only him. He neglected his duties as Jacob’s brother.

He sighs.

“Brother, how can I hate you? As you said, I let myself forget you and we hardly spoke over the last few years. I did you wrong. And mother… she saved us. She chose to out of her love.”

Jacob shook his head, still staring at his feet.

“You were always the good one, Nate. While I the stupid, incompetent one. I can’t easily forgive myself for this.” He says.

Nathaniel grimaced. Never once had he ever compared himself to Jacob. Though there was more than one occasion that he had been jealous of him. His brother was always so free-spirited. A life so different from what he had. Reserved and for the most part, strait-laced. He just never imagined that that free-spirited facade was a thin layer of plaster. He should have known better and he would have fought for Jacob harder.

All he could do was reassure him. Jacob’s stubbornness always showed whenever he couldn’t look his brother in the eyes. Minutes passed and Nathaniel could only be the observer.

Outside of the clinic and in his pack grounds, the wolves were still at it. The numerous gunshots, continually tempted his wolf. He needed to be out there too. Help and fight. He only hoped his Beta helped assist the defenseless wolves.

Just when everything was starting to be quiet, a loud banging on the door caught his attention.

“Morris, let me in,” Francis spoke loudly.