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trigger warning: descriptions of a panic attack

When Remus had woken up with only Peter at his bedside, he knew immediately that something had gone wrong. He had a new scar going through the corner of his mouth and one stretching from his ribs to his hip. His body ached for the first time since the Marauders became Animagi. The last clue was an unconscious body bearing a remarkable resemblance to James.

But it couldn't be. The body was too pale and lifeless, so unlike the boy full of life and color. His hair was matted to his head, which was coated with a layer of sweat. His hand was wrapped and chest covered in bandages. There was no blood bleeding through so it either on the other side or not as serious as his brain was thinking.

Then he heard the whole story about Sirius telling Snape about the passage, about James running to save him but only one of them coming back out, and Dumbledore coming back with his body encased in blood. There had been talk about Saint Mungos since werewolf injuries didn't respond well to potions, but he'd pulled through last moment.

"Sirius told him?" was the first thing he'd said after a long, painful silence. Peter had nodded grimly. "Can you get Lacerta? I-I just really need her right now. No offense, Wormy."

"None taken," he said, patting his knee before he left.

It hadn't taken more than a minute as she had apparently already been on her way. Peter knew to give them space, he'd never understood the bond between Lacerta and Remus or Sirius and James. He didn't have a platonic soulmate, but he had concluded that they worked out their issues better with the other by their side. 

She looked positively frazzled, totally unlike her usual well-put self. Her hands were shaking as she tentivly poked her head in the curtain. "Peter told me the whole story," she said.

All of his emotions seemed to flood over him. He had missed her so much over the months and cursed himself for not trying harder. He knew that things were over between him and Sirius. He knew that Snape would tell the entire castle that he was a monster and they were sure to chase him out with pitch forks. 

He opened his mouth but the only thing that left was a broken sob. This seemed to shake Lacerta out of her nervousness as she leapt onto the bed to engulf him in a motherly hug. He clutched onto her desperately as his tears soaked through her shirt. "I'm so sorry," he cried.

"Don't be," she kissed his forehead. He noticed that she too was crying. "I was an idiot Remus. I should've been there for you. I shouldn't have pushed you away and even though I still have trouble wrapping my head around it, I know that you care about me as much as I care about you. Maybe not as much because I love you, Remus Lupin."

"You're stupid if you think I don't love you, Lacerta Black," he let out a watery laugh.

She wiped the last of his tears, "Screw men. They all suck anyways. Lets run away and never look back."

"I couldn't do that to James," he smirked.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she said with genuine confusion.

"Nothing," he smiled, it didn't quite reach his eyes. 

"Do you want me to find him? Cut off his dick? Burn him alive?" she asked, knowing he was thinking about her brother. Her hand rubbed his back as she moved to lay next to him in the bed. 

"No," he seethed, resting his head on her chest as she ran her fingers through his hair. "If I ever see him again I'll beat him to a bloody pulp. I could've -- I could've killed someone. I almost did."

"James will be fine," she said, but it sounded more like she was trying to convince herself. "If anything, he's going to complain nonstop that he can't play Quidditch."

Lacerta Black -- James Potter --Onde histórias criam vida. Descubra agora