What Have You Done? Negan X Reader

Part One: Chapter Thirty-One

"Negan..." She mumbled, stepping the small step of space between them to him and cupped his face as his knees collapsed to the floor. She followed him to the floor, her eyes flooding dangerously and threatened to spill over. She blinked the tears away the best she could, but the tears caught in her eyelashes and as she blinked, and when they managed slip through her thick lashes, they stuck to her cheeks and rolled down her face.

His breathing sounded forced as he had confused and sorry eyes on (Y/N), her eyebrows pressing down in half ovals. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She held his face as he struggled to breath more, his adams apple bobbing as he gasped for air. She held his face in her hands, her head shaking slowly as she watched his expression slowly morph. Into a...smile?

Confusion overtook her for that small second where she didn't know what was going on. That was short lived. Then the pain set on as she realized what had happend.

Negan leapt up, spry as ever, nearly pushing (Y/N) to the ground. The sound of live flesh tearing made her shiver and her face crumple as she stood, stunned for that small second where she had no time to react. No matter how many times she heard flesh tear, rotted or living, it always made her feel a way she didn't like. It sent a soft shiver up down her spine and made her want to gag.

Most of the time, the walkers' skin was already so rotted, it was just a soft squelch from the base of the skull breaking, and it wasn't that bad. But, the slow, agonizing sound of lively skin tearing? Ugh, it made her skin crawl.

And then the time where she regretted everything set in as she realized what he had done.

Negan had ripped the knife out of his lower stomach, barely even wincing as his anger took over, his deep eyebrows pressed down flat and a sneer came across his face.

He thrusted the knife forwards with all his might, he was probably hoping to kill her, to stab her somewhere where when he ripped it out, she would bleed out and he could watch the light drain from her eyes.

And, she knew he would have. But, he didn't.

...Why?

It looked like he curved mid-air, aiming for her lower stomach, then her left thigh. It looked like the world moved slower for him, and he had time to calculate his options, and decided not to kill her, and she was greatful for that. She just didn't know it at the time.

Her eyes widened and she looked down, her jaw opening. She closed it, then slowly lowered her hands to her thigh, still in shock. But it didn't last long. The ache slowly burned into her thigh, spreading all around, and she everytime she moved, she could feel the knife tip scraping against her bone.

Her jaw clenched tightly, and she swallowed hard before pressing her eyebrows down and she let out a whimper-type groan.

"Fuck!" She yelled, looking up at Negan with both her hands around the knife, her fingertips pressing firmly against her skin. Her thumbs carefully touched the handle. "What the fuck!"

"What the fuck?" Negan repeated, a wince on his face as both his hands pressed against his wound. Blood coated his fingers and his jeans before he slowly tore off his blood-soaked shirt and began ripping shreds. "What do you mean, 'what the fuck?" He mumbled as he worked. "YOU stabbed ME. God, (Y/N). What were you even thinking?" He scrunched his face, perhaps in pain, or in embarassment for her.

Needless to say, she felt humbled. Very humbled.

"Really, I wish I could see what's going on in your head." He closed his eyes for a long moment, leaning against the nearest wall on his shoulder blades. His face looked pained, and a slight moan escaped his lips as he closed his eyes and pressed his eyebrows down.