Almost love

chapter 11 - all for her

Pov: Nate

The pain subsides a bit once I reach Lana's house, my thoughts swirl around until my headaches and the only thing running through my mind is how she's going to react.

I gather what's left of my energy, I ring the doorbell. Please open the door, love. "It's Nate," I shout, hearing my voice crack along with my heart. I don't want her to see me like this, so fucking broken and beat up, but I can't help it. I need her, now more than ever. In such less time, I found my safe place, my real home, it's her. That scares me.

"It's open, come in, I'm upstairs!" She responds loudly and I lean my forehead against the door.

I collect all the strength I can and walk up the stairs, my hand is still tightly gripping the bruise near my waist and I can feel blood dripping from my split lip & nose. I'm in such a bad condition, fuck.

I suck in a sharp breath when I reach up, I lean on the doorframe and glance inside to see her seated on her window ledge looking all cute in her nightwear. Her hair is covering a part of her face and she tucks it behind her ear, she's so beautiful. 

The minute her eyes meet mine, her eyebrow raises a concerned look, and her jaw slacks. Oh god. "Nate, what happened? Are you okay? Oh my god," she panics and practically runs toward me. 

With utmost care, she holds my hand and guides me towards the edge of the bed, I hate worrying her, and this time I'm a fucking mess. I hope I don't scare her away. "Lana I need a towel and an Ice pack, please" I whisper, my voice breaking and my jaw clenched due to the pain. 

 "Yes okay, just hold on, I'll get them for you," she utters and rushes downstairs. I suck in a sharp breath and tilt my head backward to move and use the headboard for support for my back. I wince at the pain spreading through my chest and decide to bear with it for as long as I can. 

Moments go by and she stumbles into the room holding the items, "Where did you get hurt?" she asks me, a growing concerned look flashing in her eyes. My heart somehow swells and deflates at the same time as she carefully leans over and takes off my shirt. 

I can't bear the pain all that well anymore, "Side of my waist, fuck Lana, it hurts," I softly grunt and screw my eyes shut. It hurts, all of it, not just the bruises. 

I glance down to see a big wound that still has a few blood clots forming around it, shit, it's worse than I thought. She gasps and looks into my now tear-filled eyes, I'm sorry I'm such a mess, Lana. I wanted to tell her again and again until she accepts my apology. 

My heart falters and multiple cracks break through the fragile surface that has been broken countless times already, "I'm sorry," I breathe out and a stray tear falls from my eye. I'm so pathetic. 

I take in a controlled breath and gently hold the side of her face to bring her forehead close to mine, "I'm here Nate, let me help you please," she breathes out, and I nod. Don't get her involved in your shit, let her go- my mind screams but my heart says a whole other thing. 

My heart beats and it beats for her, & it has made its decision. I've made mine with its helping hand. 

"Please," she breathes out and I nod with a close-to-shattered smile. She deserves some good parts of me, all good parts of me, and none of this crap.