Rick And Morty X Reader

The Whirly Dirly Conspiracy

Jerry had a rather depressing day alone in his apartment. He came home to an empty home, washed his underwear in the sink, ate dinner alone, watched TV alone and he may or may not have cried while showering. He laid down in bed alone, the place completely quiet. Jerry just shut his eyes and tried his best to drift off but just as he closed his eyes the door to his apartment was kicked open. Jerry, startled, sat up in bed seeing a drunk Rick enter the apartment. "Jerry! Jerry, come on! We got to go! You got to come with me, Jerry!" "Rick?" Jerry questioned Rick stumbled into the home, obviously inebriated, knocking things over as he staggered over to Jerry's bed. "It's important, Jerry. The fate of the galaxy rests on your shoulders. Let's go. Put some pants on. N-Never mind, there's no time for pants, Jerry." Rick grabbed Jerry and started dragging him out of his bed and out of the apartment. "I'll make you a pair of pants on the way. It's a Rick and Jerry adventure! Rick and Jerry chapter!"

Time Skip

"Then I thought, 'Hey, what about Jerry? He's...He's good with regular folk.' This is a real situation where...where...Where Jerry could really shine. He's a master convincer." Rick said "Rick, I'm not an idiot. I know what this is." Jerry solemnly said. "Oh. Okay, well, I told (Y/n), look, parents get divorced. They get sad. He'll be fine, but I think she's worried you're gonna, you know." Rick made a gun with his hand putting it to his head pretending to shoot himself. "And you know how (Y/n) gets when she gets emotional. It impedes my work. So, I told her I'd take you out and give you a win." "Wait. My daughter asked you to take me on some kind of pity adventure to keep me from killing myself?" Jerry questioned with a surprised tone. "Wait, w-what did you think it was?" Rick asked with a raised brow. "An execution."Jerry answered "Geez! You really do need a win." Rick said "No! I-I don't know. I mean, you never made me the pants, so..." Jerry trailed off. "So, you thought I was gonna drive you into the middle of the galaxy and shove you into the vacuum of space with your dick hanging out? And we're seeing how you'd act if that were about to happen? I mean shit I'll make you the pants right now." Rick reached over pressing some buttons. "Take me two seconds to make you pants." "I have pants at home!" Jerry said "Jerry, if I make pants, they'll be better than your pants at home. Also, if I wanted to kill you." Rick let his sentence trail off the implication rather obvious. Jerry threw his hands up. "Yeah, I get it. It would be amazing. Please, take me home. I'll tell my daughter we had an amazing adventure." "Well, if it's all the same, could we go get our story straight? Because you're a terrible liar." Rick said pointing at Jerry. "You called me a master convincer!" Jerry spoke offended "You believed me?" Rick said. Rick flew the cruiser to a rather swanky looking planet. He landed, parking in what resembles a grand style hotel. When they got out of the cruiser the duo were even greeted by a valet dressed in a purple suit. "Huh. This seems kind of fancy." Jerry spoke taking in his surroundings. "Jerry, for all you know, this is the equivalent of an alien truck stop. You have no frame of reference. You're in a universe beyond your imagining. But, yes, it is super fancy." Rick tossed his keys to the valet and started walking. "I mean, my job here is to make (Y/n) happy. I'm not gonna take you somewhere dangerous." Rick said.

Suddenly a spear flew out of nowhere stabbing Rick right through the chest, pinning him to the wall. Jerry jumped back letting out a scream. "Rick Sanchez." An alien stalked up to the pinned Rick. The alien had pink skin with a large flat snout-like nose sitting atop of his head, he had yellowish eyes that hung on the side of his face with the use of tentacle-like extensions. "I told you if I ever saw your face in here again, I would stick you like the pig you are." The alien spoke, grabbing the spear moving it around to induce more pain. "Shnoopy Bloopers," Rick coughed up a bit of blood, "I told you if you tried," He picked up a bottle next to him breaking it on the wall stabbing Shnoopy Bloopers's in the neck. "There'd be two funerals." Shnoopy Bloopers dropped to the floor his gaping wound gushing out green blood. Jerry screamed covering his mouth. "Aaah! Someone? Uh, someone? Someone!" Jerry shouted. Suddenly Rick and Shnoopy Bloopers were enveloped in a golden light. The glass in the alien's neck fell out and the spear in Rick's chest just fell away. The two men let out relieved sighs standing up as if they hadn't just been mortally wounded. They laughed jovially before hugging one another, further confusing Jerry. "My friend! It has been too long," Shnoopy Bloopers said "Oh, it's great to see you again, buddy! Yeah, you're doing it." Rick said.