Chapter 33

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Giada

This is really awkward. Don't know why I thought it wouldn't be, now that my mind has fully returned to the current time it's all I would have expected.

But I can't bail now so here we are.

"Well, do you have anything to say?" I ask when I can't take the silence any longer. Andrea, who's been staring at the sheets between us, suddenly looks up.

I can barely make out his expression in the dim light but judging by the deep crease in between his brows, I'd say he's worried.

"Would anything make a difference?" he asks slowly. I nearly groan at how dense he is. I'm here, am I not? Now he wants me to spell it out for him?

"Yes. I mean, maybe. Everything is such a mess and I don't know what to do, okay?" I sigh before going on, taking a leap as I confide in the man that's been treating me like trash for the past few weeks. "Before you kidnapped me, I thought I had no one.

"No friends, no family, not even a pet. I went to work, sure. Returned to my apartment each evening, yeah. But I wasn't myself. I was bitter and sad, fucking pathetic, to be honest, but now I have my memories back. I remember you and Leo and all the good times we had together. I know that I didn't use to be alone." I groan, having no idea where to go with this now.

Like, do I beg for him to take me back?

Over my dead body.

No, I've made enough of a fool of myself tonight. It's his turn to tell me what the hell is going on in that thick scull of his.

"Okay," Andrea says slowly, his eyes still intently on mine. "What are you saying?"

"I am not saying anything. What do you think? I mean, you remembered me and it seemed pretty damn easy for you to treat me like literal dog shit. You have nothing to say about that?" I ask bitterly. No matter how strong my resolve for handling this like an adult was, I can't help but get agitated and a little hurt, to be honest.

"That's not fair," Andrea protests weakly as he shakes his head. The lack of fire in him only fuels my own.

"And what happened to me was? Nothing in this messed-up scenario is fucking fair, Andrea! Nothing! But here we are so fucking deal with it and speak your mind because honestly, I'm way too tired for your games right now," I snap.

"Giada, what the hell do you want me to say? Honestly, what did you expect coming here? For us to just kiss and make up? For the recent past to just evaporate now that you remember me? Did you think I'd drop to my knees and beg for your forgiveness?" he yells right back.

"No! God, what is wrong with you? I came here because I can't sleep, okay? It feels like two people are trapped in my body and I don't know who the hell the real me is!" I take a shaky breath, getting on my feet with my hands buried in my hair as I start pacing.

"I thought maybe you could help me! I thought you would because only a few minutes ago, I got to relive the second time we met and I thought maybe you were still in there. So, sorry if I'm wasting your time. Sorry for bothering you with my shit when you've probably been over me for months but guess what, I haven't. For me, all our encounters, every kiss and touch and word feels like it happened just recently.

"And I should hate you, I get that. I should hate you the way you seem to hate me but I can't do that! Because every time I close my eyes, I see you. The you from before our accident, the one that laughed and joked and treated me like his equal! His queen! And then I open my eyes and you're not there!

"Even worse, I get shown what we lost every time I wake up and then I have to come to terms with reality all over again!" I take a deep breath, drowning my lungs in the well-needed air. It still isn't enough.

The atmosphere seems to press down on me, all the pressure dropping on my lungs until I can't breathe at all. I gasp for air, doubling over as I blink back the dark spots invading my sight.

Fuck, what is happening to me? Who's messing with the air in this room?

I take a few wobbly steps, trying to blindly find my way to a door or a window, anything that can provide me with what my burning lungs are begging for. But I can't seem to move. Everything's too much. My vision too blurry, the rushing in my ears too loud and I can't think straight.

Distantly, I can feel something warm and firm settling on my shoulders. Then it moves to my neck, my cheeks, back to my shoulders, all at a frantic pace.

Somehow, the feeling mesmerizes me. Mesmerizes me enough to distract me from the iron fist closing around my throat.

"Giada! Hey, breathe. Just like that. Good job, come on, keep doing that! Breathe in and out, just like that. You're fine. It's all going to be fine!" an urgent voice says, getting louder with each breathe I take on its command.

When the fog on my mind finally clears and I realize it's Andrea talking to me, touching me and helping me calm down, I quickly take a few steps back.

"What happened? What the hell was that?" I ask, my voice doing nothing to mask my hysteria.

"It was a panic attack, I guess. You need to calm down, Giada. You're fine," the man tells me. At least now he's talking to me, I think bitterly.

I'm unable to meet the man's eyes as I calm down. The silence in the room is nearly unbearable but what's even worse is the way my skin burns uncomfortably with Andrea's unflinching attention.

This time, unlike my memory, it has nothing to do with attraction but the shame slowly creeping up on me. Now I can't even have a little talk without turning into a complete mess? What's next, I'll start talking to my own shadow?

That along with all the talk about my two sets of different emotion sure as hell make me sound certifiable.

"You okay?" Andrea finally breaks the silence.

"Yeah. Um, sorry for that. Anyway, I should probably leave. I shouldn't have come here, sorry for waking you and well, see you whenever," I get out in one breath. Then I try to push past the man in this room, my eyes downcast as I head for the door.

Only, I don't make it. Instead, a gentle hand wraps around my wrist, whirling me around so I'm faced with him.

And the sight nearly knocks the wind right out of me again. It's Andrea, of course it is, but he looks different. Different from what I've gotten used to recently but so familiar from all those months ago.

His brows are slightly drawn together, his bottom lip in between his teeth but the real difference is in his eyes. His eyes which are silently pleading with me right now, completely unguarded and beautifully raw.

"Stay. Please."

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It's before 10pm on a Friday night and I am absolutely drained lmaoo. Anyway, here u go with today's second chapter.

If you liked it, don't forget to comment ur thoughts and vote:)) I love reading& replying to ur comments!

Have a great day/night<3

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