Taming His Stallion [BWWM]

36_Undeniable

Danny

Bell mentioned that she'd be attending the gala tonight with Paege.

Funny how it was with my sister, and not with me. That little detail stung a lot more than I cared to admit.

Sure, my sister was a good friend and an incredible person. That's not in question. But I'd always wanted Paege to turn to me when she needed a friend or just someone to talk to. I wanted her to know that she could count on me.

Instead, lately, I hadn't exactly created an environment rife with such a possibility, and I couldn't blame her for going with someone who'd have her back, and whom she trusted.

I was every bit responsible for this turn of events, and so I shouldn't be surprised that things haven't been going my way of late. At least, where my girlfriend is concerned. But that didn't mean I liked the distance that had developed between us.

In fact, I couldn't help but feel a bit jealous. It's silly. I should be happy that she found a friend to go with. But, somehow, I just couldn't get over the fact that I just didn't fit the bill.

I don't know what the heck is wrong with me. Well, besides the fact that I'm an idiot.

It served me right for making hasty assumptions about her. What did I expect when I essentially blew up at the woman for hugging a friend?

Never mind her friend didn't merely seem friendly. No, not in the least. There seemed a glimmer of something more in his eyes.

Paege probably hadn't noticed it because she really cared about him as a mere friend.

But instead of confronting that guy–man to man–I shook the very foundation of trust that Paege and I had worked so hard to build and stupidly accused her of being unfaithful.

The guilt and hurt ebbed at me more now that the realization came into focus.

I should have trusted her. And if I didn't want her to be my ex, I'm going to have to before all this is over.

An unsettling thought nagged at me. I couldn't shake the feeling that her faith in us is shaken. That I was on the verge of losing Paege.

We were at odds again, and I was grasping at straws, thinking of a way to reel her back in. To restore her confidence in me–in us once again.

But nothing seemed to be decent enough to warm me back into her good graces.

I was completely stumped.

How did I correctly convey to her, how much she meant to me? That I was beyond grieved that I seemed to keep hurting her? That I was extremely appalled for my behaviour? And that I didn't want to lose her?

That all I wanted was her, and nothing else?

I felt nerves building in a crescendo. My stomach twisted in a knot as I fastened the buttons of my cufflinks.

Bell was the first to express her support for our relationship. I knew she wanted the best for us. So, why was I even intimidated by the bond both women shared?

It was incredibly ridiculous that I would be jealous of their friendship.

Maybe, it's because my sister had been nothing but good to Paege, whereas Paege and I had had a rocky relationship from the start. And if she was going to kick either of us to the curb, it was sure as heck gonna be me.

The revelation–this entire situation–presented a very difficult pill to swallow and stirred up the nervous tension that had been building inside me.