Chapter 5

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My eyes scanned his image. Peter Rivera is in front of me on his yellow-green beach shorts with those six-pack abs which I don't think helps him in any way because he still gets hit. He has physically changed a lot. I remember the first time I saw him in 3rd grade, that time he was already friends with Britney.

She walked toward me holding his hands with a big smile on her face while Peter kept looking the other way while walking. That time, my arms were wrapped around Shane because we were playing in our school's playground. Then Britney walked toward us screaming, "guys!" which made both of us turn around to her.

When I looked at Peter's innocent blue eyes, I was captivated as if I was drowning in the sea. They were so deep that they could mean everything. At that moment, time stopped. Everything around me froze. All I can remember until now is that I stared at his eyes and he stared back at me.

I would never forget that.

I liked him since the first day that I met him. We were... fine friends.

He never showed interest in me or any affection so it led me to think that he didn't like me. Instead of trying my best to make him like me, I did my best to stop liking him if he wouldn't like me back. Because I knew he was not the only guy in the world.

I think I was able to succeed. Now, I don't have feelings for him. Except for the thing, I feel when I see his bruises and the thought of him being hit by his father thus that one goosebumps crazy thing when he looks at me. It hasn't vanished after all these years. But I don't look at him anymore the same way I looked at him on the first day that we met.

If I could only go back to the time when I first talked to him then I would get it. Because I still remember how shivers ran to my spinal and my nerves were too crazy. As I stared at his perfect body with a few round circles in the corner, I thought of how he can take it. How he can take being treated the way he shouldn't be. I don't mention it to him because I know how much it would hurt him.

I'm scared to hurt him; I'm scared to make him think about things I know he doesn't want to think about. "You okay?" After being zoned out, I was taken back by his words. My eyes widened the time that I realized I have been staring at his body for a long time now.

That was... weird.

"Oh, yeah, I- I- I was... just thinking... of a few things," my right thigh was vibrating; a thing that happens to me when I'm nervous. I hope he knows that it's not what it looks like. "Okay..." he awkwardly responded. So he thinks it's something like... ugh. I can't even say it.

He nodded his head and looked around after our eyes caught each other. "Why aren't you getting dressed yet?" When he narrowed at me again, I frowned at him and let the lines appear on my forehead. "Dressed for what?" I crossed my arms and then sat on his bed. His bed is softer and smoother than mine. Last night I was able to sleep but my bed was a little hard and I lacked a pillow. I'm planning to ask Amber for some extra comforters and equipment in my room

"We'll go swimming, don't you want to?" Yeah, right. I forgot about it because I was distracted by how he looks right now.

"Oh, umm, well yeah. Wait for me," I tried to avoid the annoyance between us so I ran to my room and shut the door.

I leaned at the back of the door and slowly slid down to the floor. This is already a disaster. This is just the second day of summer yet, I don't think I'm enjoying it. I immediately grabbed my phone from my pocket and browsed through the set of people with faces and names and numbers.

Then I found Britney's number. She's probably busy but I really got to talk to her. This embarrassment should end. Why did I even think of staring at him? Okay, well he was gorgeous.

"Hey, Charlie! Are you enjoying the summer? So, tell me about it..." now there she is trying to tell me that I am having the worst summer ever.

"Not good, not bad," at least I'm not alone.

"What? Why? Tell me about it!" through the phone, I heard water boiling and some metals clanging but I ignored them and looked at my unpolished nails.

"Well, it's boring because I and Peter are the only ones in here and we don't know how to make this summer as good as it is supposed to be when you're here," I rolled my eyes and slowly leaned my head on the door as I sighed heavily. Sighing helps me let things out.

"Boring? Well, there are lots of things for you guys to do there. As far as I know, Mancheston Beach is not a boring place. It's the best place on earth! So go in there and try to make things up," I rolled my eyes again for I can't get what she's trying to say.

"That's not the problem!" I almost screamed with my fist formed into a shell.

"Then what is it?" She sounded like she bumped into something but I can't pay attention anymore.

"Do I even have to mention it?" being bored with the conversation, I sniffed my hair. I could use a bath.

"Oh, well I think I can already sense it, Peter being Peter, right?" She got it!

"Uh-huh," Peter being Peter; being the guy who's being too adorable again.

"Maybe that's just how you look at him," perhaps, she's right. My back starts to feel a little hurt, this makes me feel like I'm in my mid-70s already. I'm a 19-year-old, not a 75-year-old. 

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