One Hundred Fifty

02 - Stars Grant Wishes

Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

- Mark Twain

The breeze feels enough to make my body hair stood up and my nose runny. Agad kong pinunasan ang ilong ko saka binalik ito sa pagkakaulunan ng ulo ko.

Nararamdaman ko ang mga dahon sa braso ko at ang kati na dulot ng lupa na kasama nito. I don't mind. It feels good and natural.
I'm in some place I don't know what to call. I just mindlessly walked and my feet brought me to this nice playground, and I'm hungry, and thirsty.. and I'm lazy to go home. Kung meron pa ko no'n.

Plus I'm busy counting stars.
I can't help but frown when I finished muttering "Twenty One." There's only twenty one stars in the sky and it's not even that bright!

Oh shoot! Wait. There's a moving star! It's so bright and it moving so fast!

Ay teka, bulalakaw ba yan?

Omg! It is a shooting star. Maybe it's time to make a wish. I gently closed my eyes and whisper words that only the wind can understand.

Sana mabuhay ako sa mundo na hindi ko na kakailanganin pa ng pera. Sana hindi ko kailangang pumili ng kapayapaan sa gitna ng mga problema. Sana hindi nalang sila ang naging magulang ko. Sana hindi ko na kailangang gawin ang mga bagay na kailangan ko.. Kundi ang mga bagay na gusto ko. I wish I can stop being useless. I wish I can live my life, my youth. Cause the responsibilities are taking it away. I wish I can take it back, all of it, all of me. I wish I can... feel joy again.

I opened my eyes and wiped the little droplet of tears that escaped in my eye. Bitterly smiling..

The star looks good while running in the sky. Are you also running away from something, little star?

"Oh no." Sambit ko ng marealize kung saan papunta ang bituin na kinakausap ko.

Agad akong tumayo at paatras na lumayo mula sa pinagkakahigaan ko. The star can be considered far, but any minute it can reach me.. and I can still run.. But my feet won't cooperate..

The star is getting closer-no, the meteorite? Damn it! This is not the right time to think what it's called!

Feet.. Move away.. Move away! Bakit ayaw mo?!

But the light it has is captivating.. is it begging me to stay and catch it fall? Or is it my own will to accept my fate? Or.. Is this a door I'm seeing to escape the life I'm running from?

Sa papalapit na ilaw nito ay napapikit ako.

The next thing I opened my eyes,

I'm in some place I don't know what to call... again.

Huh? Was I dreaming? Napakurap ako at tinignan ang paligid. Nakaupo na ako ngayon- it looks like I'm inside a restaurant. Nasa tapat ako ng lamesa at nakahain ang iba't ibang putahe na hindi ko aakalaing makikita o matitikman ko. Nakaharap ako sa dalawang matanda, lalaki at babae at kapwa ay nakatingin saakin habang nakangite.

What the hell??

"Did you like it?" tanong ng matanda.