Hopeless | taekook

Chapter 1

No one's pov [⚠️ tw:self harm, throwing up, suicidal thoughts.]
Kim Jungkook is 16 and broken. He was kidnapped for 4 years. Used and bruised. Hurt and sad.

Jungkook's pov
I wake up from a nightmare. Covered in sweat. Tears formed in my eyes.

I sat up and look at time 4:30 am. I got up and went to my bathroom. I'm glad I have my own bathroom.

No one can disturb me and my business. I avoid the mirror. I splashed water on my face. I looked over to the blade sitting on the counter.

I grabbed it and sat on the bathroom floor. I harshly dragged the blade along my wrist. I gasped.

Blood rushed out of the cut. I dragged the blade across my arms. Making messy lines. Blood flowing out my arms.

I stood up and grips the counter. I turned on the water. Ran my arm under the water.

Bandaged my arms. Leaving my bathroom. Laying down my bed.

4 hours later 8:28 am

I wake up to knocking on my door. I got out of bed and unlocked my door. I saw my mom.

"Breakfast is ready" my mom says. I nodded my head. She leaves the room and go downstairs.

I changed my shirt since my other one had blood on it. I went downstairs and sat on table.

"Oh Jin is coming over today. He and his friends are stay for the summer" she places a plate in front of me. I nodded.

They are staying at my house since they go to college in Seoul and i live in busan.

I looked down at food.

Eggs and pancakes. So fattening.

I struggled to eat. I half the plate. It took me a while to eat. After I ate I went upstairs. Locked my door. Went to the bathroom.

Shoved my fingers down my throat. Forcing the food out. Gagged a few times. Tears forming in my eyes.

I leaned against the bathtub. Breathing heavily. I heard Knocking on my door. I got up and opened the door.

I saw my brother Jin "hey jungkook" he says hugging me "have you been eating?" He pulled away.

"Yes I have I promise" I smile. We both go downstairs. I see jin friends. They all say hi and stuff.

I sat on the couch watching all of them laughing and talking. I looked at one of his friends the most.

Kim taehyung. He looked at me. I turned away so quickly. I went upstairs after that. Locked my door again.

I grabbed a box from under my bed and grabbed a pill bottle.

Took 6 of them. Laid in my bed. Drinking alcohol. Awful thoughts filled my head. Suicidal thoughts.

It's been a few hours since I took the pills. I'm all alone with my thoughts.

I want to kill myself.

I want to cut to deep.

I want to swallow pills.

I want to hang myself.

I want to die.

I didn't realize that tears were rolling down my face. I touched my face and cried more.

I pulled on my hair. Let out a struggled cry. Scratching at my head making it bleed. 

I want the bad memories to go way. I got up from my bed and felt faint.

I grabbed onto bedpost. Grabbing my head. Feel a headache coming.

I sighed. There was a knock on the door. I wiped the tears off my face. Fixed my hair. Took a deep breath.

I unlocked the door and  saw Jimin. One of jin's friends " I can I come in?" He asked and I nodded my head yes. I turned around towards my bed.

Saw the alcohol and pills I forgot to put away. I walked over to my bed and grabbed them and put them under my bed.

"Jungkook what are those?" He pointed at the pills and alcohol "it's nothing. What do you want?" I sit on my bed.

"You're doing drugs and you're drinking. Are you a alcoholic?" He asked sitting next to me.

"No I'm not a alcoholic and please don't tell my parents or Jin" I asked him.

"This is bad. You could die" he says. I sigh "I know but it's whatever now why are you here?" I ran my hand through my hair.

"Dinner is ready" he says standing up "I'm not hungry" i say as my stomach rumbling.

"You're stomach growling. Come eat" he held out his hand and I grabbed it.

We walked downstairs and sat at the dinner table. A plate was placed in front of me. So much food.

Chicken and pasta. So fattening.

I pushed around the food. Looked at everyone laughing. I sighed quietly "is the food not good?" mom asked. making everyone turn their head towards me.

"No it's good. I'm just not hungry" I say looking at her "well you need to eat. You're so skinny" my dad says.

"I'm not hungry" still pushing the food "you need to eat" my mom says. Everyone still looking at me.

"No" i pushed the plate away from me. My mom pushed the plate closer to me "eat" my dad says.

"No I'm not fucking hungry" I grabbed the plate and threw it on the floor.

Food and pieces of the plate Fly in the air. I breath heavily.

"Jungkook" my dad yelled. He and my mom stood up. I looked at them. Mom walked over to me. She grabbed my arm.

"Leave me the fuck alone" I pulled my arm away from her.

I ran upstairs. My dad yelling at me to stop. I slammed my door and locked it.

I leaned against the door. My parents yelling at me to open the door. I went to the bathroom and grabbed the blade.

My dad banging his fist on my door. Jin yelling at my parents to stop. I sat down on the floor. Dragged the blade across my wrist.

Blood seeping out the cut. I draw a few more lines on my arms. my thighs and stomach.

The yelling died down. I took off my clothes and got in the shower to wash away the blood.

I watched the blood go down the drain. After a while the water got cold. I got out the shower.

Put on a black long sleeve and a sweatshirt. Lying down on my bed. Holding a soft teddy bear from my childhood.

No one's pov
12 year old boy named Kim jungkook was walking home from a friend house.

He walked past this alleyway. He saw a man in the ally. He walked faster but the man was faster.

The man grabbed jungkook. Put a cloth over his mouth.

Jungkook began to scream but it sounded muffled. His eyes began to close. He passed out.

The next time he woke up. He was in hell.

A/N
New story.

I hope you guys like it.

There will be more TW scenes.

I have no idea how to write a eating disorder but I'll figure it out.

Goodbye have a nice day/night.
Love svft.multi