See Me As I Am

LuciPOV: Punishment

Lucifer didn't know how to tell The Detective what it meant to him that she'd tracked him down and brought him back. There was still a pain deep inside trying to make itself heard, but Lucifer was doing his best to avoid it. Despite the fact that he'd told Chloe everything, she still wanted him around. Lucifer took comfort in that and tried very hard to ignore the feeling that he needed to be punished for what he did.

Lucifer had never killed anyone before. Being invulnerable made self defense rather unnecessary, and before the Detective he'd never had anyone he had to protect. Lucifer had been alive since the beginning of time, but it was like he hadn't lived before Chloe Decker.

He'd never say it out loud. Lucifer felt unbelievably guilty even just thinking it, but it had been an easier decision to kill Uriel to save the Detective than it should have been. Making himself stay away from her because it was what he'd thought she'd wanted at the time had been harder by far than plunging Azrael's blade into his brother's chest.

The thought hurt. Lucifer didn't like this kind of pain. When a bullet pierced his skin there was pain but it didn't cut as deep as the wounds to his heart did. Bullets wounds healed faster and left battle scars, but wounds to his heart bled out endlessly without leaving a trace on his skin.

Lucifer did his best to push the pain down. He didn't want to feel it anymore. He didn't want to think about it. Instead he focused on helping the Detective with her zombie case. With a little desire power, Lucifer was able to find out what the bridesmaid had been hiding. Lucifer always enjoyed it when his desire trick got some information out of a witness or suspect that Chloe, on her own, would otherwise have failed to retrieve. It made him feel needed, and he wanted Chloe to need him. Lucifer didn't really understand why, but being needed by Chloe was important to him.

Lucifer tried very hard not to think about his brother as he tagged along with the Detective on the case. They interrogated the head zombie bride's ex boyfriend. Lucifer let Chloe take the lead. He couldn't help but still be worried that she would get over this whole forgiving him thing and yell him out of her life again. Lucifer couldn't allow that to happen.

"It's Jason right?" the Detective askedsaid as she sat down across from the suspect in the interrogation room. Jason nodded.

"What's this all about?" Jason asked, defensively. "I haven't done nothin' wrong! You can't keep me here without charging me, so get on with it!"

"That's not why you are here," Chloe continued calmly. "There was an incident at the wedding you attended this morning. We just need to ask you a few questions."

Lucifer didn't like this guy. He was looking all together too smug and full of himself for the devil's liking. Lucifer didn't like the way this Jason guy looked at him.

"I got rights," Jason said with a huff. "I don't have to answer your questions." And with that he crossed his arms over his chest and slumped down in his chair as if determined to remain there.

"He certainly doesn't seem all that upset that his ex-girlfriend is dead," Lucifer piped up. "Maybe he is the shooter."

Chloe raised her hand to silence him, but before she could ask the perp another question he spoke in a small voice.

"Peggy's dead?" he asked, mentioning the name of the slain zombie bride. Lucifer almost couldn't believe this was the same man who had been giving him the evil eye just moments ago. He looked suddenly devastated.

"Yes," Chloe said. "It's my job to catch her killer."

"But she can't be gone," Jason said.

"Were you and Peggy still close?" the Detective asked.