Chapter 26

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I wasn't hungry, I never ate something in the morning, so I decided to take my laptop and go outside. It was 8:15 so I still had enough time before class would begin at 10. So I got outside and sat under a tree from where I could see some other students, our janitor at Blackwell and even some squirrels. I took a deep breath and it felt so good and relaxing and I was really inspired that morning.

"One time, after a period of maths, the guys in my class fulfilled their typical routine by coming to my table. I didn't pay attention until one boy in the group asked if I thought that I was better than them, because I got an A in the last test. I still didn't pay any attention, didn't even look at him or the others. But then he raged more and more and insulted me more and more. 'Smartass', 'Stupid cunt', 'Nobody will ever like you anyways.' I never admitted it, but it cut deeper than anything. But I couldn't stay quiet for any longer. 'If you'd study instead of fucking everybody around here, you wouldn't be jealous of my grades. Just because I'm not a dumbass.', I whispered, still not looking at them. But then, the boy freaked out completely. He screamed at me that I should never say something like that again and then I looked up at him, bored expression on my face and raised an eyebrow.

All I could see was his hand going up and then hitting my face with a loud slap. I felt how tears filled my eyes, the other people in the group looking shocked,  pushing the boy away, before they asked me if I was okay. 'Fuck off.' I told them, put my things together and ran outside, my hand covering the spot on my cheek where that asshole slapped me. I ran home, which actually was a long way, I was just walking and crying for almost 45 minutes. I came across some people but nobody asked if I was okay, nobody cared. Nobody ever cared.

When I was home, I ran into my room and screamed. As loud as I could. Then, I lay in my bed and continued crying. After two hours, my mother came to me, asking me what happened and I told her everything. She said that I wouldn't go to school for the next two weeks and we would see what happens. The next two weeks were quiet, I went to a therapist every afternoon and felt better after some time. When I got to school again after these two weeks, people asked me if I was okay and told me that the boy was suspended for at least three months, the school year wasn't even that long anymore. And the people apologized and said that they didn't think it was that hard for me. 'Don't act like you'd care now.' I told them. 'You all did that. You still don't know how hard it was.' And then they left and I didn't talk to anybody again after school.

When I got home, my mother told me that I had to decide on a place on another school, if I wanted to go away. I chose the school that was the furthest away from Florida. I think I did that rather well because my new school was in Oregon. I only had to survive the last few weeks there and then I would be away from those assholes forever. And that was the point when my life truly changed."

I was happy to write down everything that I went through. I saw it as the ending of this horrible time and I wanted to help people who had gone through the same shit as me and tell them that they weren't alone and they will never be alone.  I didn't want to get any pity, I just wanted to show what being bullied could do to a person's mind and feelings.

I sighed happily when I finished writing everything down and checked the time. I still had one 45 minutes left and looked around, seeing Max together with Chloe coming towards me. "Listen" Max started. "I was a total asshole. And I'm sorry. I just..." I interrupted her. "I've heard your conversation, Max. I know what you wanted to tell him, but... you know, bringing up his father is just..." "An ass move. I know. And..." She sighed. "I will try to talk to Nathan again. To say that I'm sorry." "Thank you. And I appreciate what you wanted to tell him. If you want me to be there with you when you talk to him..." I suggested and Max nodded. "Great idea. Maybe during lunch break? You could tell him to come outside to the picnic tables or something." I quickly nodded when I suddenly felt a hand grabbing mine. "Holy shit, what the hell are you doing here?" It was Nathan, sounding as angry as usual when he was talking to Max. Then he pulled me, so that I stood up and I had to grab my laptop, it almost fell down. Then, he pulled me away, but this time, I looked back at Max and Chloe, who didn't say a word in our conversation, and tried to apologize with the look I gave them. 

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