Ecstasy

Prologue

We were perfect for each other...
Until we met.

It was one of those things where you loved someone, you knew you really did. But you knew that being together would only cause trouble. Maybe that was why it was called a crush. They were supposed to crush you. Your heart. Your whole being.

But this wasn't a crush. It was my wife.

I loved her. She knew I did. I loved her for a decade but it felt like I loved her for a millennium. I loved her since I could know right from wrong but it felt like I loved her since I saw the light of this earth.

Maybe I loved her before. Before I even came to life. I wasn't the type who believed in anything, but now I believed that if I had a past life, Ashley was there. And she was mine.

"Sir, are you ready?" I heard my drivers voice say, bringing me back to reality. Turning my head to face him in the front, I quickly agreed and asked him to start the car, driving me to my next destination.

Looking back outside the window, I faced Ashley's house one last time this afternoon. I knew I'd be back this evening. I always came back.

Even if I was considered a creep for always staying an hour three times per day outside my wife's house and looking at the house intently, I wasn't. There were several reasons. One of the main reasons being how I couldn't sleep without knowing she was safe.

I just couldn't. I wasn't exaggerating.

Since the accident and I got diagnosed with PTSD, seeing and knowing she was safe made it better for me to sleep at night. Maybe I'd sleep for an three or four hours. And when I slept that long, I was more than thankful to the universe.

Living with PTSD was not a walk at the beach. Well maybe it was, except you were in my home country, Jamaica and you were walking naked with flames on the ground and the atmosphere was filled with poisonous gas. Then you could say it was a walk on the beach.

"Henry, after the appointment, you know where to go right?" I asked as I lit a blunt and put it to my lips.

"Yes sir, miss Stephanie's school", he said with a smile, making me smile as well at the mention of her name. Stephanie.

My daughter. She had grown so well, for a four year old, she was quite small but yet cunning. Very smart too, I mean what would you expect when she was being raised by someone like Ashley? She resembled her mother in so many ways that I almost felt jealous and wished I hoped for a boy instead and see how things would have worked out. That was what Ashley wanted all along.

Ashley... she was all I could think about. She was my dream and nightmare. Whoever said love brought scars must have gone through hell.

I heard the car come to a halt, making me nearly jump with fear before I heard Henry quickly speak, "I'm so sorry sir! I forgot that I was supposed to park here and almost went past it!"

I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe, relieved that it was nothing serious. But at least I was alive to speak shit. "What are you? A dumbass? I didn't hire you to park like an amateur", I spat watching him quickly get out of the car and open my door.

I got out and looked at him furiously. He looked down at the ground apologetically. "I apologize sir, it will never happen again".

"I know, it won't", I said reaching my hand out, the blunt at the corner of my mouth.

He looked at my hand then up at me with a perplexed look, "sorry?"

"You're fired. Give me the keys".

"But sir—"