Ecstasy

Expectations

Standing outside the door, I looked at the two inside. They both had their backs facing me. Ashley was taking some documents from her shelf, standing in front of Ricky who sat on a chair facing her back.

"You know if Emily finds out about last night she will have my head", Ashley said, looking at one paper before throwing it in the small dustbin next to her. She was cleaning up.

"True. I still can't believe you and Dominic had sex", Ricky said with a small laugh. Well I couldn't believe it either.

"Neither can I. But last night, you know, it didn't feel like just sex.... It felt deeper", she murmured the last part to herself, almost freezing to try and find the right words. I walked inside a little, making sure they didn't hear me before leaning my back against the door frame.

"Mhm? What do you mean?" Ricky leaned forward.

"I don't know. Maybe I'm just overthinking. Maybe it was nothing. I'm a woman too and I have needs, Dominic was there last night and I had to release my sexual frustration in some way. It was just lust. I'm sure it was the same thing for him too", she quickly said. Those words broke me.

Ricky was quiet for a moment. "And Xavier?"

"He shouldn't know about this. I want to be with Xavier. He knows that. All we need is Dominic to sign those divorce papers". As Ashley spoke, Ricky turned around to try and grab a newspaper he saw across the room, immediately spotting me by the door. He opened his mouth in surprise but then I placed my index finger on my lips, asking him to keep quiet and just continue.

He nodded his head and turned back around. "Okay.... So there's no chance for you and Dominic? Last night meant nothing?"

"Of course Ricky! I mean look at Dominic, there's no way in heaven I could get back—" she turned around to face Ricky but then her eyes landed on me, cutting herself short in surprise at seeing me by the door "—with him", she ended with a soft voice.

I looked at her, feeling shattered. So all that nervousness I had did come for a reason. You know that disappointment you felt? That embarrassment? It's like you saw it coming but thought the excitement could devour it? The type you got when your prom date let me down. The one you felt when your girlfriend said no after planning so much for when she would say yes. The one you got when your bride didn't walk down that aisle.

You just felt so embarrassed, disappointed and ashamed in yourself. She couldn't end up with someone like me?

I threw the bouquet down the trash can next to me, nodding my head at what she said before throwing the watch at Ricky who caught it immediately, my eyes not leaving Ashley who's mouth was still agape with shock.

"You... you forgot that home, so I thought you might need it", she looked at the watch in Ricky's hands and slowly back up at me. He placed it on the coffee table in front of them both.

"Dominic—"

"I should get going, wouldn't want to waste much of your time", I said about to walk out before Ricky called me.

"Wait, I was also about to leave, so maybe we can walk out together", he stood to his feet, walking towards me and grabbing the bouquet out of the trash can next to me, earning a look from Ashley.

"Peréz will love these".

I didn't say much to her and just walked out, Ricky on my tail. He jogged a little towards me until he caught up.

"Dominic, are you alright?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" I said waiting for the elevator doors to open. I didn't look up at him, fearing he could see the lie on my face.