OFF-SIDE

𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞-𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊

Octavia
It's been three days since I found out what happened, Nash has tried to call me numerous times those last days, he even showed up here, I just..I can't answer him, I cannot talk to him, at least not right now, I can't listen to him justifying himself, but of course, we'll need to talk, later on, future Octavia problems.

A knock on the door startles me and I stand up walk towards it, unlock the keys then open it, I'm met with the last person I'd have expected to be here, "Nikolai." I let out a breath, he raises a brow "Octavia." He replies then his lips twitch, he looks inside the house as if he wants me to invite him in, I open the door wider "come in." I say and he does as he's told which is a rare occurrence.

When we sit down on the couch he leans back and waits a few moments before talking "I assume you saw what happened?" He says and I clear my throat then nod, "yes." I say what's already obvious, he sighs and looks at me for a beat like he's studying me "you need to listen to nash." He says and a bitter laugh slips out of me, his face visibly hardens but he doesn't interrupt,

"Listen to him? Say what exactly, oh right sorry Octavia I had to fucking make out with them, it was really justifiable, I mean what the hell" I say, my last words coming out as a yell, he remains calm which isn't quite surprising, considering his facade and all that shit, he runs his tongue across his teeth, "listen. To. Him. Octavia, If my friend really did something wrong I'd have never put myself in this fucking position, letting him explain to you won't make you lose anything, so listen to him then judge." He says raising his brows and I rub my face.

"What if it's not worth it?" I ask clearing my throat, "I wouldn't have come here if it's not worth it." He replies immediately, I let out a deep breath because I know what he's saying is true, I'm just mad because I couldn't do this without him showing up, I drop my head back, "fine." I say letting out a sigh and he raises his brows, "fine?" He asks and I shrug my shoulders then swallow the knot forming down my throat, "not fine obviously, but I have to deal with it." I say letting out a breath, "well, then you better get it done." He says while standing up, I stand up with him but he dismisses me with a hand, "it's fine, I know the place." He says calmly and starts walking away and I'm left here with myself, once again my thoughts eating me out.

***

Adrian pulls me closer to him, I lean back, my head dropping on his shoulder, "you'll be fine." He whispers and I nod trying to reassure myself, we're supposedly waiting for Nash to come here, he wanted to meet outside but it's definitely better here, or at least that's what I'm trying to convince myself, a knock on the door startles us both as we turn around.

I slowly get up and walk towards it, taking a deep breath I carefully open the door, my breath hitches the moment I see him, it always does, it's like this is the first time I'm seeing him all over again, a stranger, he looks..different, dark circles surrounding his eyes, and his face carries so much pain it cuts right through me, "Octavia" my name comes out of his mouth as a broken whisper, he opens his mouth to say something but he just continues staring at me, no words coming out.

I notice Adrian getting out of the room as he closes the door behind him leaving us alone, but I don't miss the glare that he throws in his direction, I drop on the mattress staring at him, waiting...
he clears his throat and looks at me, "I'm sorry-" he starts and I frown, "that you had to find out like that." He says and my mouth falls open, "you're sorry about the way I found out not what you did!" I tell anger crawling through my skin, and tears gather in my eyes, his face softens, "no, Octavia look-you need to listen to me without interrupting." He says and looks at me, his hands slightly tremble and my skin itches to touch his.

But I raise my chin and stare back "explain then." I say with so much more harshness than I'd ever direct in his direction, he clears his throat like he's trying to embrace himself then speaks "I didn't cheat on you-" he says and I bite on my tongue to stop myself from saying something that I'll regret, "you need to believe me, it all started when Nikolai decided that I should go have fun because I was so fucking sad that night-because you didn't want to try for the sake of our relationship." He sighs the relationship that's being destroyed right now.

The problem is..I wanted to, so fucking bad and I was even planning on telling him it, I was just scared of taking the risk, I was scared of trying, but he was worth every fucking risk I'd take, was, "so I went...and from what I remember, they left to dance and I stayed at the bar, for a while, I mean before your friend-the pink haired one." He says and my heartbeats pick up at the mention of her name, Lana, the fucking bitch, I listen to him, holding my breath and silently praying that what she did is forgivable.

"She kept saying shit but I didn't pay attention, I finished my drink and started leaving, and I-I was almost there until I find her again right in front of me, and I feel every fucking muscle in my body going rigid, I didn't realize what was happening back then, but now I do...I was drugged." He says his voice ending in a whisper and his lips twist in disgust as if he's remembering something, I almost don't want to hear what's coming, because I know what it's, and I don't think I can hear that, but he needs to tell his story, and I'll listen, I'll try to.

He swallows hard and looks up at me, his face contoured in pain "you need to believe me, sweetheart." He says softly and I do, I already fucking do, he sighs and speaks "I don't remember anything..and I mean I literally remember nothing, but the only thing I remember is that Nikolai was the one that found me, other than that I don't remember a fucking thing, I was just like you Octavia, I was surprised just like you, love I had to watch myself being assaulted without even remembering it." He says and a bitter laugh slips from him.

He looks up again, "do you even believe me? Because I don't." He says and closes his eyes, tears leak down my cheeks and I stand up walking towards him, all my earlier anger towards him fading, I wrap my arms around his shoulders and his lips part as he turns to look at me, his hands wrap around my waist as he pulls me closer, "I'm sorry." He whispers, and I shake my head, "I'm sorry." I say softly because maybe I should be, a slow smile spreads on his lips, a genuine one, and it lightens up his face, his beautiful gorgeous face, "thank you for believing what I said Octavia-there's literally no fucking proof for my words, you could've easily dismissed my words and It would be understandable." He says, his hand slowly through my hair, I didn't dismiss his words because I'd have always believed him, because I know how that feels, to have no proof.

His body goes rigid against mine and his hands tighten on my waist, "what do you mean?" He asks concern suddenly surrounding his face, my brows furrow, and then realization kicks in, I said it out loud, no. I shake my head "it's nothing, I meant that I know what it feels like for everyone to be against you." I say immediately and he shakes his head, "what do you mean love?" He asks again his voice softer but his eyes aren't, I take a deep breath and turn away from him but two fingers on my Chin bring my face again in front of his, "never, look away from me, sweetheart." He says so softly then adds, "never."

A vote is really appreciated