I Can't Help It - Steve Rogers

Chapter 53

Rachel sits beside Sam in the front row of the church in London while Steve helps carry Peggy's casket down the aisle. Rachel's heart breaks at the sight of Steve's tear-stained face when he walks past them. He sits beside her quietly and stares at the carpet so Rachel takes his hand and holds it within her own. She feels him squeeze her hand in acknowledgement but doesn't remove his gaze from the carpet.

"And now, I would like to invite Sharon Carter to come up and say a few words" the priest says and Sharon, aka Steve and Rachel's neighbour from Washington takes the stand. Rachel and Sam share a shocked glance, wondering why she's here and Rachel nudges Steve a little. He looks at her confused and she nods to the stand, he looks up to see Sharon. She makes eye contact with Steve and Rachel before focusing on her speech.

"Margaret Carter was known to most as the founder of Shield, but I just knew her as Aunt Peggy. She had a photograph in her office, Aunt Peggy standing next to JFK. As a kid, that was pretty cool but it was a lot to live up to which is why I never told anyone we were related. I asked her once how she managed to master diplomacy and espionage in a time where no one wanted to see a woman succeed at either. She said compromise where you can. But where you can't, don't. Even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. Even if the whole world is telling you to move, it's your duty to plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye and say 'No, you move'" Sharon says and Steve seems to process her words with a lot of thought while Rachel nods in agreement.

After the funeral, Steve stands inside the church staring at Peggy's pictures and Sam walks out just before Rachel goes to do the same. "I'll give you a minute" she says to Steve before beginning to walk away. But Steve takes her hand before she can take 2 steps away. "Please stay" he begs when she turns to meet his eyes. "Are you sure? I can wait outside" she asks and he nods. "I want you to stay" he answers as he pulls her towards him. He wraps and arm around her shoulders before returning his gaze to the photos. She wraps an around his waist and looks at the photos too, remembering when she met Peggy.

Rachel enters the room behind Steve to see Peggy lying in her bed. "Peggy, I've got someone you've been wanting to meet" Steve says as he makes his way around to the chair with his hand laced with Rachel's. "You must be Rachel" Peggy assumes with a smile. "Yeah, it's an honour to meet you" Rachel replies while returning a smile. "I'm so glad to finally meet you. I've heard a lot about you" Peggy says as Rachel takes a seat beside Steve. "All good I hope" Rachel jokes and looks at Steve. His cheeks redden as Peggy reveals how much he's spoken about Rachel. "All wonderful things, I promise" Peggy assures Rachel.

When Steve leaves the room to refill the jug of water in Peggy's room, Peggy turns to Rachel. "He loves you, you know" she states and Rachel nods. "I know, I love him too" she replies. "Will you look after him? He gets himself into trouble sometimes" Peggy asks. "I've noticed" Rachel chuckles and Peggy laughs a little at her response. "I promise, I'll look after him. I'm sorry that you two didn't get to be together" she adds in a serious and sympathetic tone. "Oh don't worry. It all worked out in the end. I've lived a happy life and now he's found someone that he can live a happy life with. You" Peggy replies with an assuring smile and Rachel returns the smile.

"She was amazing" Rachel mutters after remembering her first of many visits to Peggy with Steve. "She was" Steve replies with a smile and pulls Rachel into his side a little tighter. He realises that after losing Peggy he's held onto Rachel tighter than he has before. He lost Peggy once and now he's lost her again. He can't lose Rachel too. He feels like the only way to ensure he doesn't lose her is to hold onto her tight and never let go. Respectively, Rachel doesn't want to lose Steve, not after losing her parents. She wants to keep him close and safe just as much as he does her.

Steve and Rachel turn to the door when they hear footsteps approaching and see Nat making her way towards them. "When I came out of the ice, I thought everyone I had known was gone. When I found out she was alive, I was just lucky to have her" Steve says. "She had you back too" Nat replies with a smile. "Who else signed?" Steve asks knowingly. "Tony, Rhodey, Vision" Nat answers with a sigh. "Clint?" he questions. "Says he's retired" Nat responds and Rachel chuckles, that's not the first time she's heard that. "Wanda?" Rachel asks. "TBD" Nat shrugs and the three stand in silence.

"I'm off to Vienna for the signing of the Accords. There's plenty of room on the jet" Nat suggests to the couple causing Steve to sigh. "Just because it's the path of least resistance doesn't mean it's the wrong path. Staying together is more important than how we stay together" she tries convincing them. "What are we giving up to do it?" Steve asks and Nat sighs in defeat. "I'm sorry Nat, I can't sign it" Steve states and she nods in understanding.

"What about you? You haven't said a word about it" Nat asks, looking to Rachel. "I can't sign it either. I'm sorry Nat" Rachel apologises, not wanting to be at odds with her best friend. "The worst years of my life were when I was controlled by others. I was told what to do and when to do it. I can't go back to that" Rachel explains and Nat nods as Steve rubs her arm to comfort her.