I Can't Help It - Steve Rogers

Chapter 71

It's been a long 3 weeks since Thanos erased half the universe and everyone is quiet, feeling hopeless and helpless. Rachel sits beside the bathroom sink while Steve shakes his beard. "I can't believe you've gotten rid of it" she states with a small smile, trying to lighten the depressing and sorrowful mood. Steve chuckles at her and her smile grows in response. He rinses the razor under the tap and wipes the excess shaving foam from his face. Rachel suddenly feels the counter shaking and looks at Steve confused. He notices it too and stops the small mirror when it starts shaking. "What is that?" Rachel questions. "I don't know, come on" Steve answers as he offers his hands for her to hop down. She takes his hands and jumps down from the counter.

They both run across the field outside the compound, with Nat, Rhodey and Bruce following. They find Pepper already waiting hopefully while Carol Danvers, who they'd met soon after the snap, lowers a space ship onto the grass. Tony starts to exit the ship with another woman, a blue woman. Steve runs over and helps Tony as he pants while Rachel stays with Nat, Bruce and Rhodey, unable to shake the memory of Tony hurting her. The scar on her chest a constant reminder.

"I couldn't stop him" Tony states. "Neither could I" Steve replies as he helps Tony stay on his feet. "Hang on. I lost the kid" Tony says as they come to a stop and he looks at Steve sadly. "Tony, we lost" Steve states in defeat. "Is uh...?" Tony starts, unable to finish his question. But thankfully, Pepper arrives in front of him, crying tears of joy and relief. They embrace each other and Tony assures her it's ok before they continue their way into the compound. Rachel shakes her head, distracting herself from the memories of Siberia and follows everyone back inside.

Everyone gathers in one room, watching the pictures of everyone who's vanished appear above the table. Tony's now hooked to an IV and is eating something while they discuss the recent events. "It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth" Rhodey states. "World governments are in pieces. The parts that are still working, are trying to take a census" Nat adds. A photo of Peter Parker appears on the screen in front of Tony and he averts his eyes, unable to look at the young boy that he watched disappear. "It looks like he did... He did exactly what he said he was gonna do. Thanos wiped out... 50% of all living creatures" Rachel explains as everyone watches the photos of their friends appear on the screens.

"Where is he now? Where?" Tony asks expectedly as he looks at Steve. "We don't know. He just opened a portal and walked through" Steve answers with a sigh. Tony catches sight of Thor sitting alone and quietly across the room and asks "What's wrong with him?". Rachel looks over at Thor and looks away soon after. She's tried talking to him, tried helping him, assuring him it isn't his fault but he won't listen to a word she says. "He's pissed. He thinks he failed. Which of course he did, but there's a lot of that going around ain't there" Rocket, the raccoon answers. "Honestly, until this exact second I though you were a Build-A-Bear" Tony replies as he stares at Rocket in disbelief. "Maybe I am" Rocket states, unbothered by Tony's assumption.

"We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. Deep space scans and satellites, and we got nothing. Tony, you fought him" Steve states before Tony interrupts. "Who told you that? I didn't fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the Bleeker Street magician gave away the store. That's what happened. There was no fight, cause he's unbeatable" Tony replies, becoming more and more frustrated. "Okay. Did he give you any clues, any coordinates, anything?" Steve asks, not wanting to frustrate Tony further by questioning the fighting. Tony sputters as he makes a face at Steve and Steve sighs in defeat while Nat and Rachel share a quick glance.

"I saw this coming a few years back. I had a vision, I didn't wanna believe it. I thought it was a dream" Tony starts explaining but Steve interrupts desperate to stay on topic. "Tony, I'm gonna need you to focus" he states as he stands straight and takes a step towards Tony. "And I needed you. As in, past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late buddy. Sorry" Tony interrupts quickly, causing Steve stop in his tracks. "You know what I need? I need a shave" Tony says as he pushes his bowl of food across the table, stands and removes his IV while Rhodey tries getting him to stop. "And I believe I remember telling all of you alive and otherwise, that what we needed was suit of armour around the world. Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not. That's what we needed" he reminds everyone and Rhodey tries stopping him from taking any more steps. "Well that didn't work out, did it?" Steve replies, somewhat defeatedly. "I said we'd lose. You said 'We'll do that together too'. And guess what Cap, we lost and you weren't there" Tony states as his gaze fixates on Steve who sighs sadly.

"That's what we do right? Our best work after the fact? We're the Avengers. We're the Avengers, not the Pre-vengers" Tony states, getting more worked up by the second. "You've made your point. Just sit down okay?" Rhodey urges Tony as he holds him still, nodding to his chair. "She's great by the way" Tony states, pointing at Carol while trying to get out of Rhodey's grip while he keeps urging him to sit. "We need you. You're new blood. Bunch of tired old mules" Tony says as he looks at Carol but his gaze quickly turns to Steve once again.

"I got nothing for you Cap. I got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options. Zero, zip, nada. No trust, liars" Tony states angrily as he stands right in front of Steve and looks at Rachel while she stands beside Steve. They both stare back at Tony, feeling guilty for lying to him about Bucky but neither regretting their decision to protect Bucky. Rachel especially finding it difficult to forget that day after Tony almost killed her. If he had blasted her any harder, she could've died. She's never known if he was holding back or if she just got lucky. She finds herself keeping all the emotions locked within her as she maintains her stare with Tony.