Sailing With Destiny

A Mental Maze

Mitchell's POV

I read over the note Mila left behind for what must've been the hundredth time. Shame and guilt washed over me each time I read her sincere, sweet words. She came over intending to gift me something and possibly remind me of her feelings. It took one moment for everything to be ruined and it was all my fault. 

"I love you, always. Your Milo," I read over and over. 

I almost squashed the note out of frustration but stopped myself. I folded it in half and kept it in my pocket and then kicked the coffee table. I tugged at the roots of my hair and for the umpteenth time tried to recall what happened the previous night. 

I checked my phone but Mila still hadn't even opened my texts. I needed to talk to her but also knew that I had nothing to say. The toxicology reports weren't in yet and waiting was torture. I needed to prove myself to Mila. However, I knew that whether I was intoxicated or not, if I slept with Liza, I would've lost Mila forever. 

When I got back from Mila's place, Liza was still at the penthouse. She appeared or pretended to be confused and as out of it as me, but it was difficult for me to believe her. She claimed not to recall what happened either, but I didn't know if that was true. I repeatedly asked if we had sex, but she insisted she didn't know. 

With a sigh, I picked up the sweater Mila got me. She was allergic to anything corny but still got us matching sweaters. If I wasn't so mad and upset, I'd have laughed at the pattern that she deliberately chose. The green sweater had a reindeer with his mouth open, throwing up candy canes and other Christmas knickknacks. She must've been in a good mood when she got the sweater made because mine had the word nice on it. 

I felt like shit when I thought about how badly things turned out. I began to doubt if ending our relationship was ever a good idea. But it didn't matter if I was guilty of what she suspected. I knew she'd never want to even look at me let alone rekindle our relationship if I slept with Liza or anyone else for that matter. 

The waiting drove me insane. I got up and began to pace. I stared out the large window with the view of the city. I watched snowflakes fall from the sky to try and distract my mind, but it didn't work. 

Maybe I shouldn't have canceled my flight back home. Mom isn't happy about it either, but I can't leave things with Mila as they are and pretend to be happy. 

It seemed that spending the holidays together wasn't meant for us. The first time, she got into that awful accident which I still believed was my fault and now she was to spend her holidays heartbroken because of me... again. 

Just then my phone received a notification. I rushed to grab it and hoped it was Mila or my test results. I was a little disappointed that it wasn't Mila but relieved that those damn results were finally in. 

Anxiously, I opened the results and read over them. I understood most of it but had to do a little research because of the medical terms. I was relieved but even angrier when, unsurprisingly, drugs were found in my system. 

My fingers tightened around the phone, and I tossed it on the sofa out of anger. I knew something was amiss. I hadn't had many hangovers in my life and the few I had, I always remembered what happened. The only time my memory failed me was, once again, when I was with Liza, and I mixed alcohol with meds. 

On both occasions, Liza was involved. Now that it was confirmed, I was embarrassingly drugged, I needed to get to the bottom of what happened. I was an idiot to not kick Liza out the second I saw her face. I wished I'd never met her, she did nothing but ruin my life and it was high time, I made it clear that I never wanted to see her again.