In My Head ❌

In My Head-Part 37

A/N: Hello Everyone! it's so good to see you all again and apologies for absence and lack of updates. Things have been sort of hard at the moment which is why I haven't really read or responded to comments on my stories or socials but I am going to try to start doing so again as well as updating a bit more regularly . 

Thank you all  so much for your continued support and for reaching out and requesting and continuing to read despite lack of updates, it really means the world especially now 💜💜and I am forever grateful 😊

No major warnings for this chapter really it's kind of a much needed transition chapter so I apologize if it's boring but the next one will hopefully be much more interesting. 

Please keep requesting and commenting and I promise I will respond to all of them very soon💜💜

OK everyone, let's get into it....

Stephen's POV

"Now, you'll be in the wheelchair for a while; until you get your strength back."

The doctor's voice cut into my thoughts as he and the nurse lowered me into the small black chair making my face flush as the nurse threw a blanket over my lap to hide the gap where the gown opened.

It had been two days since the phone call with Dec and ever since then Simon had visited regularly, his unusually friendly demeanour making me even more anxious.

Simon had never been this nice to me before and now I couldn't tell if it was because he genuinely cared about me or if he was simply doing this out of pity; it was probably the second one.

"Now if you are walking short distances...very short mind you; you can use the walking stick but other than i'm going to have to insist you stay in the chair until your heart is healed and you get your strength back."

I frowned even more, biting my lip to keep back tears as the doctor and nurse stepped away allowing me to raise my eyes for the first time and look at my new predicament.

The chair was shiny cold metal and I shivered a little as I ran my good hand over one of my wheels, sharp tears stinging my eyes and threatening to fall as my injured one remained limp and unresponsive like it belonged to a mannequin and not a human being.

I didn't know why they were so insistent that I get out of bed today and try this chair. The doctor had said something about "going home" but I had simply shook my head.

There was no way they would allow me to go home alone and no one from my immediate family was even in the country right now.

The closest thing I had to family here were Ant and Dec and in the week that I had been in here they had only come to see me once except for that one time that it had been Ant on his own but by now I had almost convinced myself that the whole thing was a dream.

"Mr. Mulhern? Are you alright?"

The nurse spoke and I looked up again, nodding once before tilting my eyes back down towards my lap again.

I didn't have anyone, no family and no friends; I wouldn't be going home today or any other day; I was going to be stuck here in this hospital, in this chair, alone with my thoughts day in and day out.

I should have let the darkness take me when I had the chance, it would have been better than this.

"Stephen?"

The nurse's voice again, softer this time and let my eyes drift up without raising my head as the soul crushing despair weighed me down making me feel tired and exhausted and so so heavy.