Of course this happens to me

Chapter 24

The world comes back into focus slowly, first I can feel things, then hear things and now slowly my eyesight is clearing. I blink a few times before the face hovering over me comes into focus, Orien is leaning over me massaging one of my hands. As he notices I'm awake I hear him call for the others and suddenly Spencer is there helping me sit up slightly with him sliding behind me so I'm leaning on him.

"How are you feeling?" he asks as he massages my other arm. Looking down at my legs I see Alex rubbing my calves with my feet in the anti foot drop braces. "The world is kind of foggy," I stutter back to him slowly trying to make sense of whats happening.

I lay there for a while with the others massaging my limbs until the tension mostly leaves them. Once my hand is free I reach towards my head to check if the helmet it on, I feel it immediately and frown.

"Off?" I ask Spencer pouting a bit, he smiles at me sadly before shaking his head. "You know what the doctor said, if you have an episode or seizure the helmet goes on for a while as you're more likely to have another episode," he explains to me.

"Want to watch a movie?" Alex suggests as he sits on the table opposite the couch. I think for a moment before shrugging, I feel like I'm forgetting something. "Yeah, Lex said he wanted ........... Lex............ wheres Lex?" my brain moves too slow as I try to figure out what happened.

Everyone instantly tenses. "Will, Sir and Xan are currently with Lex, he is having a few um problems," Alex says slowly trying to hide the anger I can see clearly in his eyes. I frown for a moment before it comes back to me.

"It's not like he's going to fucking hear us he's basically deaf, deaf, unable to walk, barely able to move, most movements are involuntary and also has those ugly fucking scars. How are we meant to be in a relationship with someone who can't do anything for themselves? You said his hair is gone too? He can't even cover the fucking scars with his hair, he looks like a ghost of the man who left here with his family. Whatever fucking car accident happened took majority of Isaiah with it. He is disgusting he's not even able to use the toilet, I can't date that," I hear Lex yell.

"He ..... He hates me. I'm ugly and stupid and not dateable and I.....I.....I," the world spins as my thoughts move faster and faster. "Hey, hey, hey, no don't listen to him you are still our amazing boy, what happened does not define you and does not change anything for the rest of us. Lex seems to be going through a....... Tough time and didn't approach any of us for help so he just exploded at you instead," Spencer tries to calm me down and stop the episode that we can all sense coming. My limbs clearly don't get the message and start to jerk, tense and curl up, they all grab a leg or arm and work on massaging it as my head starts to curl into my shoulder and shake.

Pain shoots through my body and I grunt out in pain. Sir suddenly appears beside me with a small syringe minus the needle and inserts the fluid into my mouth. What feels like hours later, but was probably only minutes, my body relaxes and untenses leaving me only in pain.

"My sweet baby, are you ok? What do you need?" Sir asks as he sits beside me. "Lex...... I need to talk to Lex," I stutter out once my mouth allows me to make legible sounds. Sir frowns as he looks at the others. "I'm sorry baby but Lex is going to stay somewhere else for a while, not too far from here, and he will be visiting multiple times a week just until he feels a bit better," Sir says as he takes me into his arms and carries me to my wheelchair sitting me down. My limbs flop uselssy, weak after the episodes and the stress of the day. He settles me so I'm sitting up properly and puts on the chest harness. He lets go and my head flops foreward, my neck too weak to hold my head up at the moment making me want to scream in frustration, Sir kisses my cheek before adding the forehead strap before situating my legs and placing my arms on my lap.

"How about we go into the dining room and see if you want to eat something, I can feed you and answer any questions you have," Sir suggests. "Ok," I agree, all I want to know is whats wrong with Lex. We all head into the dining room and find Xan and Will setting the table for lunch. I'm stopped at the top of the table and Sir brings a seat over and sits beside me grabbing a bowl of what looks like yogurt and a spoon.

"Do you need a bandana baby?" Xan asks me as he stops beside me with a bottle with a lid and straw coming out. "Bandana?" I ask confused, I look at Sir. "No he doesn't for this meal, I'm feeding him," Sir respons before looking at me and holding up a small spoonful of yogurt. I accept it then he begins to explain. "When you were in hospital and fed yourself, alot of it fell all over yourself so Fin and Kitt gave us some bandanas, they go around your neck and look like just a bandana but they protect your clothing," I swallow slowly and think for a minute before nodding, no one outside of the house will see it, so it's fine.

"Tell me Lex," I say as he gets the next spoonful ready, he holds the spoon up to my mouth and waits till I accept it to continue. "So it seems Lex hasn't been doing great with his eating and has been purging after meals for a while, he hadn't done that before so we weren't keeping an eye out for that so it is my fault. We were very distracted recently and while I thought I was checking in on everyone enough it seems something has been bothering Lex enough that ....... Self-harm was the answer. We don't know what but we are working to find out and he has said he doesn't want to be here for a while so he is going to stay somewhere else for a while but he will be coming back here. He seemed to associate his problems this time with you but we all know its not your fault, he just fixated on you because you were gone and we were stressed so he blamed all his and our problems on you. It's not you're fault and we all know that he just needs to learn that too." Sir explains making me take a bite everytime I finish swallowing to keep me focused.

"I didn't realise he was struggling," I stutter out, my thoughts racing through every interaction I've had with Lex since I came back from running away. "You weren't here for most of his struggles so its not on you, its on us but even at that its not really, its no ones fault he was struggling. Now we know though so we can help him to the best of our abilities until he feels better and can come home," Sir says, "can you eat any more?" he asks as he sets down the bowl thats now empty.

"Maybe in a little while," I respond testing the strength of my arms. They seem to be functional now so as Sir goes to put the dish in the kitchen I slowly reach my arm up and unstrap my forehead so I'm able to look around now. I look over at Orien and Alex who are sitting on my other side.

"What Sir didn't say is that what Lex said and did was damaging towards both you're physical and mental health so it will be your decision on whether he can come back or not," Orien says looking at me before continuing to eat his food. Spence appears beside me and takes my attention away from my now spiraling thoughts.

"How about we go up to your room and watch a movie? I can get you into some pyjamas and you can try out the bed that Will set up for you," he suggests making me nod. A movie would be nice, I don't think I can think very well right now. 

Heyo

Hope y'all are doing well, two updates within a month? Who am I? Yeah IDK life is shit but writing instead of dealing with it is the solution apparently.

Much love

Boo xx