Bad Romance

Chapter 111

Chapter 111: Custom Made TMI

Harold ended up choosing a blasting rod of copper and oak, as did Rodolphus. Lyra opted for beech with no copper and Bella for camphor with copper. Grindelwald and Zabini came over that evening to check the wands out too.

In fact, they showed up five minutes after Rabastan wrote them that all the options were complete if they wished to have a look. Apparently, they really wished to. Zabini chose copper and blackthorn, while Grindelwald opted for copper and ash. It seemed Rabastan's idea of combining the copper with the wood was a big fucking hit which made him feel quite pleased with himself.

"You haven't chosen your own wand yet," Lyra observed as they all sat in the library, having a glass of wine.

Gellert shot Rabastan a look that was all raised brows. "I'd have thought you'd take first pick and rightfully so."

Rabastan shrugged. "I think I need a custom design. Hopefully Harold can help me make it."

The elf was sitting with them, plague doctor mask back in place. He nodded sagely. "What did Mr. Rabastan have in mind?"

"Just copper with no wood. I want something smaller and fatter... Unlike my huge dick," he added a bit hotly when everyone, but Harold and Lyra snickered.

"The size of a rod or wand in no way reflects the size of one's dick," Zabini drawled. "The smoky quartz wand Mag made me is only ten centimeters, and it's the strongest, best wand I could ever ask for. It in no way reflects what I'm packing."

Gellert gave a fervent nod accompanied by a dreamy look that Rabastan hoped was intentionally overdone because if not...

"It certainly does not," Gellert murmured, blonde lashes lowering suggestively.

"Come on," Rabastan begged. "No gay shit. It tends to make us straight men feel all crawly and uncomfortable."

"Sure does," Rodolphus agreed, making a face.

"My quartz wand is even longer than what I am packing at nearly twenty-six centimeters, but it is far, far thinner than what I am really packing, in case anyone was curious," Gellert said.

Blaise nodded sagely, a hand dropping to Gellert's thigh in a way that caused Rabastan to puke in his mouth a little. "Indeed, Gel is packing something far thicker than his wand."

"Come on! Not in front of the children," Rabastan begged and Grindelwald snickered.

"Would Mr. Rabastan like to make his blasting rod now," Harold asked, and Rabastan gave the elf a grateful look.

"Yes, please."

Man and elf downed the rest of their wine and headed outside to get started. Harold helped Rabastan to melt and reform one of the unused pieces of copper into a shorter, thicker bar in which Rabastan then set the crystal ball. He then hollowed out and charged the rod while Harold idly watched on.

"I'm excited to let this fucker go off," Rabastan said as he sprang eagerly to his feet.

He was, in fact, so excited that he didn't even notice the drained feeling that always came hand in hand with filling a blasting rod. Grinning, he hefted the piece he'd made just for himself in his right hand. It felt good, powerful, solid, and a perfect size to fit into any deep robe pocket. It felt...like a friend...an extension of himself, and he liked the fuck out of it. When he sent a blast into the night, the boom was fucking spectacular as was his whoop of glee.

"Thanks, Harold," he added in a more moderate tone, turning to the elf with a grin.

Harold shrugged. "Harold was glad to help, but Mr. Rabastan did most of the work, and he is the one who knew what sort of rod he needed."

"Still, you made things go far more smoothly, and I appreciate the fuck out of you."

Harold nodded and the two went back inside. It was then that Rabastan recalled he had a date with the hot Parvati bird the next night. Where the hell was he going to take her? What with things to do constantly, he'd had absolutely no time to give that shit any thought.

He wasn't exactly the sort to go on what one would call normal dates, so this was sort of a first for him. Of course, he'd been out with a girl before, many times, but knowing she was only a shag and probably knew as much made things different and a hell of a lot less stressful.

This time there would be more conversation involved...more normal human interaction of the sort he didn't feel good at. Of course he could talk to Bella and Rod, but they were family. Grindelwald and his boy weren't, but they didn't really give a fuck so he could relax around them. Then there was Kreacher and Regulus...well they were also family, but those two were such little fucking freaks that they'd better never judge anyone ever.

Having no idea what to do on this damn date thing was giving Rabastan so much anxiety suddenly, that he decided he'd better not give a fuck. That would be far easier. He knew little about the hot bird, so they'd just have to get to know one another before he could craft the perfect date anyway. He wasn't expected to know what she liked to do. He'd just take her out to a nice dinner where they could talk and go from there. She didn't seem to be the type who liked the rougher sorts of bars for drinks and dancing that he, Rod, and Bella went for, but what the fuck did he know? He'd just wing it in true Lestrange raven fashion and see where the night took them.