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CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE:
serving jail time in goblin mode


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"Any idea what's in the back of this truck?" John B complains for the third time in five minutes.

"Yes, John B, I know what's in the back of the truck." JJ answers clearly annoyed, "And it's gonna be fine. It's gonna work out, okay?"

U-Hauls don't have a seat for a third person. Whoever made this, didn't count on the one short, bad tempered girl that goes wherever her two best friends go. So guess what? I'm balancing myself between John B's seat and JJ's seat.

Right in the middle of them screaming at each other.

"I am sick of your bullshit plans, man!"

"Goddamned!"

"No, I'm just saying this might actually top the time you told me to fake appendicitis in jail!"

"All right, who's dumber?" I cut in, adding my voice to the yelling match, "The one who suggests faking appendicitis or the one who goes and actually does fake appendicitis?"

"And it almost worked!" JJ adds.

"You two are fucking crazy!" John B laughs, "I can't believe I keep letting you convince me of doing shit!"

"Just shut up already and get the fucking map out!" I say, kicking the map that's under my foot.

John B leans down to grab it, just as JJ says, "I have no idea where I'm going."

"Yeah, we can tell, babe." I snort.

John B opens the map on his lap, and checks for the directions. "All right, we need to get to 158, okay?"

"Just give-"

JJ stretches his arm out and grabs the edge of the map, pulling it towards him. I hear a ripping and I close my eyes with a heavy sight, throwing my head back.

"This one, man. You just ripped it out."

"God, I should be driving." I sigh loudly.

"No way. You drive like a maniac." John B scowls.

I let out a high pitched scream, "Excuse you!" I point at myself, "You should've seen me driving Topper's truck!"

"I saw a bit of it," JJ nods, "I gotta admit, she was awesome, dude."

"Thank you, JJ."

"Anytime, babe."

"Oh, God. You two are insuffer- Cop. Cop. JJ, JJ, there's a cop." John B starts tapping my arm anxiously.

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