Divergent souls || 2

Thirty four

CHAPTER THIRTY FOUR ⇆ ANGELINA
I wake up in Rowan's arms, warm and caged, I rest my head against his chest and listen to his rhythmic heartbeats.

Staring at him in awe. Feeling security filling my bones, he looks peaceful, his brown hair draped over his forehead in loose curls, his features are sharp and clear under the low sunlight reflecting over his face.

I don't know for how long I continue staring at him before he slowly blinks, his eyes instantly capture mine as they crinkle when he smiles, "Morning, Angel." He says in a raspy tone as he brushes my messy hair.

The brown waves are in a hundred different directions, "Good morning, Rowan." I murmur back, leaning closer to him, he stares at me for a long beat, "What are you thinking?" He asks, I read through the lines.

"About...what you said yesterday?" I ask, uncertainty filling my voice as I look up at him for a clarification, he nods, blinking, "I'm sorry for the way I treated you. But, If I knew I would've never-" he hovers his thumb over my mouth like he always does.

"That's not what I meant, I'm talking about the present." My brows furrow at his words, confused as I try to catch the hint he's throwing, "I don't care about how you treated me before, Angelina, I understand where all the hatred arose from." He states in a gentle tone.

I shake my head repeatedly, "I don't think I ever really hated you, I don't think that's possible in any  way, whenever I tried to hate you, or even dislike you it vanished at any moment I saw your face, Rowan." I sigh in defeat as I speak the words I never thought I'd say.

He smiles weakly, "Well, your acting was on point, i really thought you hated me." He's lying, "So you kept provoking me?" I shoot back, he rolls his eyes, "Okay, maybe I didn't really think so." He shrugs playfully and I nudge his elbow.

"God, this is heaven." He says after a moment and I turn to him, a question floating in my eyes as I wait for an explanation, "Waking up with you in my arms. I've wanted this for so long, too long." He whispers.

His words almost bring tears to my eyes. But I blink them away as I straighten and stand up, "Get up, and I'll make you breakfast." I offer, his eyebrows rise as he straightens, the blanket slipping off his naked chest.

Revealing the defined sharp muscles I spent yesterday exploring, Jesus, "Fine, but I won't accept anything less than pancakes." He holds up a finger and I roll my eyes as a small smile spreads across my face.

Brightening up my day, after I'm done with the bathroom, I approach the vanity, brushing my hair roughly, it's frizzy, a braid will help with it then, after I finish the said braid, I get outside.

Finding Rowan seated in a chair across the counter of the kitchen, "Please tell me that you don't have work today." He groans, "I had." I shrug, a small grin tugs at his lips, "Past tense." He observes.

"Yes." I roll my eyes, smiling as I open the fridge and retrieve the ingredients I'll need, eggs, milk, a lot of shit at the moment, "So I have you for the whole day." He adds.

"No." I state, mostly to piss him off, "Yes." He shoots back, seeing through my attempts, I shrug, sighing exaggeratedly, "If you beg." I tease, his eyebrows rise, "Anything for you, my love." It's the first time he calls me that.

It sends a warm rush of comfort through my body, making my heart clench in my chest harshly, that's how we continue the rest of the day, joking around, comforting each other, feeling the other, since we've been deprived of years of love that we could've experienced.

I don't think it's possible to get enough of Rowan, and I wouldn't wish it.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Tomorrow is Rowan's birthday, I've dreaded this day for the past years, this one, not at all, he isn't the type of person who would make a party for himself, when he's acting like his usual self.

Cause well, years ago, in college, he threw parties every now and then, but we won't talk about that now, I understand why he used to act that way, and it breaks me.

So I aim to replace those dark memories of Rowan's with new bright ones, that's why I sent a text to the rest of our dead friend group. I also added that declining isn't possible.

Elias cursed, Aurelia cheered, Vera sent me emojis, telling me that she's excited and Of course, Silas left me on read.

At least he opened the message, he's always been that way since I've known him, quiet, or at least with me, and well everyone but Vera, something has always been going on between them, it still is actually.

That's why Vera sent me about ten texts screaming about how she won't be here If he is, she's a liar, I left her on Delivered for now, everyone can wait.

"This feels so goddam good." My muscles were aching due to my hard work out this week, now, he's massaging my body, "That's what you said last night when..." his words trail off.

My cheeks heat up as I nudge him, he smiles lopsidedly, I tilt my head to the side. "Are you okay?" I ask, he's been...off, for some reason.

He stares at me for a beat. "Yes." He says, "You don't have to lie, I want to hear you, Rowan." I insist, assuring him with force, he scratches the back of his neck.

"It's stupid." He smiles playfully, but it's clearly not genuine, "Fucking say it." I demand since the gentle talk won't do it, his eyes spark, "Look, it just feels as if something will happen, as if this fantasy will finally become broken by a...fucking traumatic event." He drops it just like that.

Rowan is overthinking this.
Our relationship.
And it's understandable.

"I understand, but I'm here to prove that it'll be okay, babe, we have all the time in the world." I smile softly, he does too, arching a brow, "Don't babe me." He repeats my words, which makes my smile widens.

"You like it, don't you?" I'm probably saying something he would say. It's turning me on for some reason, "Of course I do." He replies shamelessly, he leans toward me, planting his mouth down on mine.

I breathe him in and pull him down, he groans in approval as his knees spread on both sides of me, he's on top of me, the position is too...intimate, but it doesn't once cross my mind that I want it to change.

It feels beautiful, so beautiful that I have someone that I completely trust to catch me when I fall, I look up into his eyes, my heart burning in my chest.

"I've always wanted you, always wanted us." I've never been great at expressing my feelings, but I've always loved talking about us, or at least when I thought that we could've been something.

Like right now again.

I don't know at which point exactly throughout my life I realized how much I'm in love with Rowan Russo, with my first ever best friend, with the man who always protected me, with the kid who made me laugh. With the boy who bought me sour patches.

But all I know is that through the past years, there wasn't a single day where I didn't love him, even through the tears, the hatred I tried to build, the anger, the rage, through it all, I still couldn't stop loving him.

"I've always loved you, Angelina, it's time you hear it, sweetheart." He whispers, then sits beside me, straightening from his earlier position as my heart nearly bursts in my chest.

It's like we're thinking about the same thing. He leans closer to me, his hot breath on my neck, his smile blinding my eyes, making mine arise.

"I love you, I've always did, and always will, throughout all those years, nothing made my heart stop beating for you, not even you could make my love for you stop growing." his words bring tears to my eyes as I stare at him.

"I love you." I choke out, staring up at him, at this moment, there's nothing more I could ever ask for, there's nothing better than this, me in his arms, his lips on mine, just us.

Always us.

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